Building Resilience with Jesse Todisco
When I first met today’s guest, I immediately felt a connection. After learning more about him, his experiences, and his philosophies, I knew why. He is the male version of me in so many ways. I was blown away instantly by his story and his openness in sharing the truth about hardships he’s been through on his journey. I wanted to bring him on She Sells Radio today because one of the things I tell my clients often is that when you decide to go for the quantum leap, there are challenges that will come up to help shape you to have the life you want.
In today’s episode, Jesse openly shares about his past and the paths he started on. Through building resilience, Jesse changed his trajectory. When you hear his story, you’ll wonder how he made it through parts of it, but you’ll also learn how he has used the challenges to shape what he does now. It is so inspiring and a true example of resilience.
Jesse Todisco is the founder of 46 and 2 Wealth Partners in Atlanta. He’s been featured on major media platforms like NBC, CBS, Fox, and Yahoo Finance. He is also the host of the Jesse Tee Show, a podcast where he has shared his story in more detail and interviews amazing and inspirational guests. Listen on today for his philosophy and how you can use your own personal challenges to lead you to where you want to be.
[2:47] – Welcome to the show, Jesse!
[3:58] – Jesse shares his background and childhood having experienced many different traumas including drug addiction and losing his infant daughter.
[6:08] – Jesse reflects on feelings from his childhood that he wasn’t wanted. He knows that his own sons will not ever feel that way.
[7:37] – Struggles and trauma can be generational, but Jesse and Elyse have worked hard to heal the generational trauma.
[8:26] – “When the student is ready to learn, the teacher will appear.” This is a quote that has heavily impacted Jesse.
[9:47] – When people go back to gratitude, everything is put into perspective.
[11:07] – Elyse shares an experience that made her realize the importance of her son needing her. The money wasn’t worth being away from him.
[13:22] – Starting in a place of scarcity, Jesse shares how he was successful in his first business and blew the money. That experience led him to seek out mentors to help teach him a positive money mindset.
[14:40] – Jesse explains that his drive is always freedom.
[15:30] – After experiencing sales scripts that didn’t align with him, Jesse was inspired to do things his own way and start his own business.
[17:30] – How did Jesse get to the point of running his own conscious awakening business and bringing in the right people?
[19:00] – Sharing his vulnerability has been a key to attracting the right people.
[20:28] – Admittedly, it was very scary for Jesse and Elyse to share their background out of fear of judgment. But through sharing their journey, they’ve attracted their tribe.
[22:08] – Jesse started his podcast to interview people to share their story. At about episode 29, Jesse decided to share his own story. It was very liberating.
[24:39] – Check in with yourself through the best way of meditating for you. Jesse explains that it doesn’t have to be complicated.
[25:55] – Giving things space, time, and introspection makes them look different. Always check in with yourself.
[28:21] – Give yourself some grace because this work can be uncomfortable.
[30:00] – Jesse is the host of the Jesse Tee Show.
[31:20] – If you love yourself and give yourself grace, you can do so much to make yourself feel better.
Connect with Jesse:
Links and Resources:
Tweetables and Quotes:
“If I didn’t go through the hard stuff first, I would be grateful for the good things that are in my life now.” – Jesse Todisco
“I was set on this path to learn about the wisdom of wealth and how to create it for myself and others and because it was spawned in that negative of scarcity, I knew early on that I needed to pave my own way. It built a work ethic and a growth mindset.” – Jesse Todisco
“Money is just a tool. Money should never be the main objective. The main objective should be the life you live.” – Jesse Todisco
“Rich people have money. Wealthy people have time.” – Jesse Todisco
“I attract my tribe. It isn’t about chasing dollars and cents.” – Jesse Todisco
Welcome to she sells radio. So my guest today is exceptional and I was recently introduced to, I guess, today through a client, a mutual friend. And when I met this guy, I literally felt like, oh my gosh, this is the male version of me in so many ways with background. Some of the things he’s been through life experience and part of what blew me away right away was his story and his openness in sharing about it, sharing about some of the hardships he’s been through on his journey. And I wanted to bring him on today because one of the things that I always tell my clients is when you decide to go for the quantum leap, there are these challenges that are going to come up to help shape you, to become the person who can have that income you’re going for the impact you’re going for the life that you want.
And it can almost feel like an initiation. And it’s probably not a great selling point for working with me or for, you know, for really going for the quantum leap. But here’s the thing, the profound transformation and the gifts that will come out of those challenges is what will lead you to where you want to be. And so my guest today is going to share his story. And I think when you hear some of it, you’re going to wonder how he made it through parts of it. But what I am so impressed by is how he’s used the challenges that he’s been through to shape who he is and what he does. And it’s such an inspiring story of resilience, which is what I really want to focus on with you today and help you learn to cultivate, uh, whether you feel like you’re going through your own initiation right now or not.
It is such a critical, it’s a critical skill and it’s not something we can bypass. And so my guest today is Jesse T he’s the founder of 46 and two wealth partners here in Atlanta. He’s been featured in major media like NBC, CBS, Fox, and Yahoo finance, and part of what I loved about him when I met him initially, as he said, I asked him what he does. He said, I’ve got really, I have a consciousness raising company disguised as a wealth management firm, which I totally resonated with, because I feel like that’s what we aim to do here at, she sells as well. So Jesse, I am so honored to have you on the show today. Welcome my friend. Thank you for that amazing introduction.
[inaudible] yeah, it’s going to
Be amazing. And so now people are saying, okay, so what’s, what’s the story we tell us what’s going on. So Jesse, will you share with us, I mean, part of what, again, really struck me as someone looking at you on the outside are like, he’s got this very successful wealth management firm, big brand has done all the things. But part of what struck me is I think when we met with it was within like two minutes, you were like, here’s the real story. Here’s what happened. And I pulled so many lessons from what you shared right off the bat. So please take us to share your story and, and let’s start there. Yeah,
Yeah, sure. And this is the cliff notes version. So just bear with me, but, um, again, thank you to you and listeners for having me on the show, but you know, I’m a, I’m a poor kid from, I was a poor kid from Boston. Uh, grew up with a single mom and my dad was a heroin addict for over 30 years before he cleaned up before the last 10 years of his life. And so I had like this awkward start to the world and in that, uh, you know, growing up, I experienced bullying for about most of my grade school years. Uh, I was a much different person back then. I wasn’t confident and I was smaller and, um, I was very emotional and so things, you know, affected me and I didn’t want to hurt people. So I never fought back. And I got my kicked physically for years, and that made me physically tough, but it broke me down emotionally and mentally.
And so I had all this trauma kicking off and I was always this, you know, even outside of that happy-go-lucky kid. And I looked at the, the world with rose colored glasses on and I had this knack for people and I would want to learn things. And I was a student. And you know, that led me on my path to where I am today. But through those seasons of life and you talk about initiation, I’ve been, everybody has been through initiation for their, their spin on this earth. But for me, I’ve been through some crazy. So from going through those experiences, um, to becoming my dad and, and being a junkie for a couple of years, selling drugs for a couple of years before I left Boston and went to the military to change my life. And through the years, I was able to learn some things after that.
But I had some other initiations which most people should never have to face. And it was, you know, holding my daughter until she passed away after seven days of birth, because she was injured delivery, uh, being by my mom’s side, after she fought an eight year battle with cancer and watching her pass away. And then finally, when my dad’s body gave out years after he was done doing drugs, you know, I had to go up to Boston after a phone call saying they found him dead on the floor and had to clean his blood up off the floor. And so like, I’ve had these crazy experiences, but I’ve had amazing experiences too. And all the, all the negativity and trauma has given color and given me gratitude for all the great things in life. And so what I can say is, you know, I’ve been, you know, an entrepreneur, you know, four times over, um, I’ve found this spirituality walk in life where I’m able to heal myself and heal other people.
I have this great podcast and I wouldn’t be able to do all those things if I didn’t go through the first, like if I didn’t go through the hard stuff first, I wouldn’t be able to be grateful for the good, the good things that are in my life now. And I have two beautiful young boys wanted to celebrate it as seventh birthday, and we’re doing a huge week of celebration for him. And it was interesting. I was on another podcast yesterday. And I remember there was a time where my dad came to me. It was, I was born on four days after Christmas. So it was either Christmas or right. You know, my birthday. And he came to me and he was looking for money when I was like maybe 10, 11 years old, so he could get high. And I remember this feeling of like, why doesn’t he love me?
Why doesn’t he, you know, want to show up for me? And I didn’t have those words show up for me, but like, why doesn’t he care about me? Why does he care more about this than me? And I was actually going through a therapy session yesterday and EFT tapping session where you tap on Meridian points and you work energy through your body. And I just sat there with so much gratitude. I was like, my son, who his birthday was yesterday, I was like, he will never, ever, ever, ever have to face this. And so we’re just, we’re healing generational trauma, which is pretty cool.
Oh my gosh. That is something, thank you so much for sharing that, Jesse. That’s something that I talk about with the way I coach both men and women, but primarily women. And it’s something I talk about with the women all the time is so much of this stuff is generational and it, it can feel big and it can feel heavy. And, um, oftentimes the things that feel like challenges to us like yesterday, I was doing a group coaching call and one of the women was talking about fear of visibility, which is a common conversation. A lot of, especially I find with the women I coach and the entrepreneurs is it’s like a lot of this stuff. It transcends generations. You know, it transcends generations. And there are things I’ve even found in my own journey where I came from a background of always having enough, but always having fear that like the money was going to go away, that everything was going to leave that I found out later, like my mom used to struggle with that.
And her mom struggled with that. And so this stuff gets passed on in our DNA. And I think part of what sometimes comforting might not be the right word, but at least helpful is to know that that we are like, for those of us who are here right now, you and me in this conversation, anyone listening, that’s part of why we’re here is to help heal that generational trauma. So one of the questions I have for you, because you talked about the gifts in the challenges and the gifts from the initiation, but gosh, there’ve been, I mean, there’s been some big stuff in your life, right? What are the top like one to two lessons that you’ve taken from those that have actually felt like gifts for you?
No question. The first one hands down is, is a stoic philosophy, uh, that I found a couple of really, it found me, I’m a big believer that when the students ready to teachable appear. So whether that’s in the form of mentors, books, podcasts, uh, people in your life, you know, this stoic philosophy that was made famous by Marcus, a really S uh, who was a famous general back during the days of Roman and Greek antiquity, he used to be so lauded and he was so famous and so powerful that, you know, not that this is a good thing, not this probably story going to get a slave that was standing behind him. That would always just say, memento, Mori, memento, Mori memento, Mori. And that’s a more, I mean, it’s no that you’re mortal. No, that you’re going to die, but let that be the reason why you show the up today.
And that’s the best, the best way you can show up is, is in relationships in business and for yourself. Right. So if you could leave earth right now, how would you want your last moments to be? And for me, because I’ve held death in my hands a couple of times, because I’ve been through some precarious situations in my life, I know the value of time, and I know the value of a moment. And it’s, it’s a, it’s truly a gift that cliche that it’s called the present. Cause it’s a gift. It’s absolutely true because if you think about it, that’s all we ever have. Like we lived in the past, we looked to the future, but we only have now. And so if that’s the, the, the, the ongoing maternal truth of this, this earthly experience, then you have to show up every moment. It’s not easy.
You know, you think about things and like people get bogged down with, you know, they get anxious, they get, you know, a crappy boss or a crappy drive to work or whatever it is. And they kind of get out of their heads and they’re like, well, you know, this is crappy. But when they go back to stacking gratitude, I woke up today, I’m healthy. I have relationships, whatever it is, you could be happy for. It really puts perspective and allows you to be what your feet are so that you can be present shopping moment. So I would say that’s the most important thing is just knowing that you’re mortal, knowing that you only have a finite amount of time and really just squeezing the life out of every moment.
Yeah. Gosh, it, it, it puts everything in perspective. It puts everything in. And one of the things that I’m passionate about teaching now is for those of us who are in, who are either entrepreneurs or in sales, like we can get, we can get so caught up in the money piece. And that was what I chased for so many years, because I didn’t understand how things actually worked. And I don’t know about you in my own life. It was kind of just like a wake up. And it wasn’t some profound moment, but it was a, just a realization of what am I waiting, like, realizing that I was living, like I had all the time in the world and, and continuing to prioritize money over other things like family, et cetera. And as I’ve shifted that, um, that perspective in my own life, I remember I was, I was giving a webinar maybe a month ago and you know, the old me, like I was trying to do personal outreach to everybody ahead of time and then build those connections.
Cause I, you know, it’s like you do that. It helps boost the conversion rates on the webinar. But I remember about two hours before the webinar, I had maybe a hundred people left to do personal outreach to, and I was like, and, and my, my son was, um, he was with our nanny at the time. Like I could hear him just crying. And he was like, so you could just tell it was a day where he needed mama. And I decided in that moment, it was like, there is nothing that’s more important than just being with this little guy right now. And I don’t care if we don’t sell as many clients on the webinar. I don’t care. Like all the money in the world we’ve run it a million dollars from this. And it meant that I wasn’t, that my son needed me and I wasn’t there with him because I was so focused on the money.
Like it’s not worth it. So one of the things I would love to talk with you about too, kind of tying in with that is money and your philosophy on money, because obviously you help people build it. You help people build their wealth, you help them handle it. But I think you’ve got a, you probably have a unique perspective on it, given your background and given you talk about it’s the consciousness raising company now that you lead, what is, what’s your perspective on money now versus maybe back in the day when, when you didn’t have this more enlightened perspective that you do now?
Yeah. And it’s been a journey, right. And I was set on this path to learn about the, like the wisdom of wealth and how to create it for myself and other people. And it was because it was spawned in that negative place of scarcity, where there was times growing up in Boston, you know, for those that are familiar with the Northeast, it gets really cold up there. And there was times where we didn’t have heat for the winter or times where we were had limited food. And, um, I just knew early on that I’m going to go out and kind of pave my own way. And that’s kind of what I started doing early on as like a young entrepreneur. And then also like having jobs as early as 13, 14 years old, summer jobs, internships. And, um, that came from a place of lack and scarcity, but it did start to build this work ethic and it started to build this mindset about how to create money for myself. And so after I kind of grew through that season and started looking at life a little bit differently, I had some different experiences. I started looking at money a different way and started having an abundant mindset and started having a gratitude mindset. And so thanks.
How did you, so let me pause you right there. Cause I think that’s important because a lot of people listening, they may be stuck in that scarcity right now. How, like, what were some of the things you did to start to make that shift? I think that’s really important.
I think just reframing my paradigm and my mindset on how I looked at money. And so I was thankful and grateful enough to have had some great experiences and great some great successes early on in my early twenties was starting my first company and doing really well, but I blew all the money. Like I bought cars and phones and clothes and stuff. I didn’t like, cause I was a poor kid from Boston with no money management skills. And so that really good example of a bad example of money management taught me the next time that I made some money, I was going to do it right. And so I started seeking out mentors and seeking out people that were really good in this money space. And so I started learning, you know, the first thing you you need to do is have cashflow it’s, it’s, it’s the lifeblood of any family as, and you have to have a significant amount of cashflow so that when a rainy day comes AKA a pandemic or politics, or whatever’s going on in the world, you can cover your butt and you can weather those storms.
And so that was kind of a first, uh, entry point into learning about these things. But fast forward to now, money is just a tool and money should never be the main objective. The main objective should be how you live your life. It should be the vacations that you take with the people that you love, the relationships that you have, the time that you have. So, you know, rich people have money, wealthy people have time and obviously money to right, but they have to so good to be able to go and do whatever it’s. So the biggest thing for me, my biggest motivation is freedom. And this plays into all of these different things that I do in life, even as a, as a fiduciary, which is interesting because there’s 400,000 financial planners in the United States, only 5% of us are true fiduciaries, meaning we’ve taken an extra standard of care.
We’ve taken licensing that puts our client’s interest above our own, which just from a business standpoint business, one-on-one it seems like you’d want to do that. It seems like you’d want to put your client’s interest above your own, but sadly, the majority of financial planners don’t because they live in a world of getting paid for sales, getting paid for commission and that’s okay. But the only thing is, do you know, if the thing that they’re selling you is better for them or better for you and since there’s that question, you never know. And so I wanted to remove that from my business and really walk through clients holistically because I was limited before I had certain licenses in the financial planning space that allowed me to only sell certain products and services that sometimes didn’t make sense for the client that I was talking to.
But because there might’ve been a sales manager or a quote, or they were really pushing these products and saying, Hey, you have to sell these products. So for me, that was always out of alignment. And so I decided to carve and create my own business after a couple of years of being in that world and create a business where I didn’t have to do that. Where if you Elise like crypto or real estate or something that wasn’t sold by this other company I was working with, I could advise you on that because it was the right thing to do. And so that’s where it’s led me to is now if someone wants to create wealth, if they want to build cashflow, if they want to go on vacation 15 times a year, if they want to build a business and scale a business, well, now I can give you advice on how to do that because I’ve had those experiences in my life and that training in my life where I can speak to those things.
Yeah. Gosh, that’s so powerful. And I think you’re like, I think about freedom, which you talked about, right. Which is really what most of one of our core values is, is freedom. And when I think about wealth, like I love how you said rich people have money, wealthy people have time. It’s a different amount for everybody, but it’s really the ability to do what you want when you want. And, um, and to have that, that opportunity. And one of the things that, to me, I’m curious about for you, because you, you do, when you shared with me about the way you view your from 46 and two, is that it is a consciousness raising company. Yeah. How do you, how do you do that? Because a lot of my experience has been many of our listeners. They may not be specifically in the space of doing consciousness, raising work or spiritual work, but they’ve, they’ve got that part of them. And for some of them, they’re actually afraid to bring that out because they’re afraid of judgment or what if somebody thinks I’m weird and I’m not going to get clients because of this. Or they feel like, who am I to do this work? So how have you integrated that with what you do?
I’ll just, I’ll just give you an illustration. So before, when I was in this, uh, it’s called the broker dealer world where you’re working for a company having to sell products and services, you’re always chasing people. You’re always trying to find the next sale yards on a hunt. And I know this is the, you know, she sells radio podcasts, but, um, I used to be in sales. My first foray into sales was outside sales, cold call door to door commission, which is like the Navy seals training of sales. And, and like, I, I knew I could sell with anyone back in the day. And, and so those skills taught me how to sell, but I always kind of felt out of alignment. So when I became a fiduciary, taking those things off the table, it just, it made everything make sense. And so how I integrate now, the consciousness awakening is I attract my tribe.
So I’m not just chasing dollars and cents and chasing, you know, numbers. I find people and I specifically hand select the right people to come into my business as clients, because I only need about a hundred clients to have an amazing firm. Right. And so I don’t need hundreds of clients a year. I need a hundred clients total. That’s all I need. And so now I can go ahead and say, Elise, you know, she’s into some of the same stuff. She’s into family, she’s into spirituality, she’s into health and wellness. Like she’s on the level to a degree. I want to do business in life with this person. And so I’ll actually attract those types of people into my business. So I’m bringing in the types of people that are already kind of on that, that level. But even in a day-to-day context, I just, I just speak my truth.
Right. And I, and I’m very vulnerable and it’s, it’s, it’s a divine gift to be able to like share those things because it’s freed me. Right? So like, just to give people context where this comes from, I had two mentors, uh, one was Goggins, who was a virtual mentor. And one is Patrick Tucker, who was my actual mentor. And through both of their urging and story, they were like, you need to share your story and share your vulnerability. And it’s what it’s done is it’s attracted so many beautiful people into my life and beautiful relationships. Like you said, we just connected right away, like so beautifully. That’s what happens with my clients. And so if someone looks at me and says, Hey, back in the day, you used to sell drugs or do drugs, whatever it was. And you can’t do that as my financial planner, well, we’re not going to be in alignment.
Like I don’t, I’m not going to go to help. You I’ll find someone who can, but if you’re going to judge me for something I did as a kid, like they’re doing with Twitter now, like people are getting canceled. Like I can’t have that type of people in my, my business. So I attract the types of people that I want. I work with the types of people that I want. And then in terms of outside of the business, this conversation happens pretty much with everyone when it’s deemed necessary. So like, I’m just spreading the word so to speak as I go along.
Yeah. Gosh. And, and so I want to dig in there a little bit, because I think that is something that holds so many people back is that they’ve got something in their past they’ve and I’ve got plenty of it. Like, I didn’t share publicly that I had an eating disorder for so many years, because I felt so much shame around it. And it was like this big secret. And what I found was when I started to share it, it was so freeing, just like you talked about. And it’s like, okay, if it doesn’t resonate with someone, that’s fine. But then people who have similar background of body dysmorphia or lack of self-esteem or even start it’s like they, I ended up attracting a lot of those women in, but it’s also, it can feel scary when you’re first starting to share it. So for you, what was that experience like when you’re like the first time you shared like, okay. I used to, like, I was a junkie. I didn’t like, what was that like for you where you, I know the first time I shared for me, I was like sweating and I was so like, I was so nervous, so yeah. So tell us like what that was like and how you got through it.
There is, I was my soul. What’s brought me to my work today outside of my wealth planning business and podcast is this other business that I run, but, uh, it’s brought me to like my soul work and my calling, which is being able to heal myself so that I can heal other people through this journey. And the first time I even thought about it was years before I ever even said anything. It was, it was like, all right, I kind of have this thing. I’m feeling like a tug on my heart. I’m feeling called to share this story for whatever reason it was at the time. But I was always like, especially back before I was where I’m at now. Like maybe even before the broker dealer world, like years ago. And I was like, just like, I can’t say this because what will people think?
And, and, and, uh, maybe they won’t want to do business with me or they’ll look at me a certain way. And so initially I didn’t say anything, but listening to David Goggins book can’t hurt me twice on audio book, which is a tremendous, tremendous book. It’s like a podcast, but it’s also a store. It’s, it’s great. Um, he, the whole idea of can’t hurt me is if I tell you everything that’s been bad in my life and put it all out on the table, essentially, I’ve taken that power away for you to hurt me because I’ve already talked about it. And so now I’ve released myself from judgment, released myself from shame, released myself from criticism. And if I don’t criticize judge or shame myself, I don’t care if anyone else does, because that’s what self-love is. It’s not, it’s not really worrying. What other people think about you in a sense that’s one way of self-love.
So initially I was scared, uh, through the urging of Goggins and then also my Patrick Tucker, this is what started my podcast almost three years ago to the day July 9th is when my three-year anniversary was with Jesse Teesha was the idea of sharing stories. So I started interviewing people and I started talking to people and they would share their story. They would share their journey. And after each episode, it took up to, I think the 28th or 29th episode, I was finally ready to share my story. And I actually had Patrick Tucker, who was my mentor at that time interviewed me. And I shared these things that I was sharing with you. And I have like probably sweaty armpits and like, I’m on camera. And like, it’s all kind of, you know, whatever, but it was just so liberating. And then from there that was probably almost two years ago, podcast I’ve been on and people that I talk to, it’s just like, we started off the conversation.
I was like, I’ve been through this, this, this, and this. I don’t even think about it anymore. And it’s been a such a beautiful way to, again, heal myself, give myself permission to be myself and love myself. And then that also gives people permission to do the same thing too. And so if they, like you said, if they see you, if they see me and we’re out here on a podcast, or we’re talking to someone and like, well, if they can do it, I can do it. And I’ve had so many people thankfully come up and say, Hey, listen, thanks for sharing your story. Thanks for saying this. Like, I’ve been through the same exact thing and, or someone very close near and dear to me has too as well. Now I understand the perspective. And so it was just a calling that was waiting to happen. And I finally took a leap two years ago.
Uh, oh my gosh. It’s it creates this instant, instant trust because here’s the thing that I’ve found. I don’t know if you’ve found this too in the work you do, but it’s like, everyone has something that they don’t want to talk about. Right? We all have something and you probably are privileged to hear conversations. Like I do like just closed doors behind the scenes with, with our clients, right. Of childhood trauma, sexual abuse and whatever it is like addiction, whether that’s stuff, if we don’t free it and let it out of our bodies, we suppress it. It turns into disease in our bodies. Right. It turns into all sorts of all the things that manifest in your life that you don’t love that are, that are painful. They’re hard to go through. It’s like a lot of that stuff is from things being suppressed. So what would be, so what I want to ask you, I know we, we’re coming up close on time here. This is so powerful. Um, I could talk to you all day, but I, I want to honor your time. So let me ask you three quick questions to end. So for someone who’s on their healing journey, because a lot of our, a lot of our listeners are on that journey right now. What’s, what’s one step they can take today to start to heal themselves like you’ve done in your own life.
First thing is having awareness check in with yourself, sit down. Uh, this is the, this is a tool that they can actually use as, uh, you know, meditation is one of those things where it can be any number of ways to meditate. I feel that, um, a lot of people overthink it and a lot of people, um, put these guidelines in place that make it restrictive, make it hard to do. Just go sit down in your closet and a dark room when you wake up after you wake up for 10 minutes and just be quiet, that’s it. And if you, if you sit in the quiet and you, and you, you know, for me, I put my hand over my heart and put my hand over my stomach where I’m breathing, and this is just something where I can kind of check in physically and see where things are at and really allows me to kind of center.
I just, I just quiet. And I start to almost put my mind’s eye, like in my heart. And I’m like, okay. So what’s, what’s coming up for me and just sit with that feeling and may or may not, maybe nothing, maybe nothing comes up. Okay. You’re starting to learn how to tune in, but then eventually you might start feeling feelings and you might start feeling well. I’m a little anxious about my day. Uh, I’m a little bit upset about how a conversation went yesterday. I am excited about how this deal went, like whatever it is, and you start feeling the feeling, and then you can start working with that feeling. And then maybe you want to journal it. Maybe you want to say, I feel because, and this is whatever, whatever you wanna say. Um, the mighty and powerful Joe Rogan taught me, um, in the, in the heat of an argument, in the heat of a disagreement don’t ever lash right back out.
He talked about give it the night. If you can, in a very, uh, diplomatic way, like don’t walk away from the conversation don’t Stonewall, uh, don’t uh, you know, blow the person off. It’d be like, if it’s possible saying something that maybe you would regret later, hold it off. He’s like, just give it the night to think about it. And when you wake up in the morning, he’s like 10 times out of 10. The thing that I wanted to say in the moment, it’s never the thing that I say to that person. And so I think that these things come up for you. And so if you give things space and time and you give them introspection, start off with meditation in the morning, because in the morning, that’s when your subconscious brain is the most malleable. And these are where a lot of the negative things lifts negative.
Self-talk we have 60 to 90,000 thoughts a day, and most of them are negative and they all come from the subconscious. And so if you can start reframing and rewiring your thought process in the morning, do the meditation, do it for five or 10 minutes. Soon as you wake up, sit in a dark room, your closet, wherever you’re quiet, and you’re away from everything. If you have a busy life and then at the end of it, stacks some gratitude. So you’ve got the feelings, see where you’re at, you’re checking in physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually. And at the end of it, you say, I am grateful for the fact that I woke up today, but a smile on your face, feel the gratitude. I am grateful for the fact that I have health. And again, health is, you know, depends on the person, right? But I woke up today. I have health. I have this opportunity in front of me. And then once you start doing that, you start to become a little bit happier. So you’re, you’re becoming more aware, more present and tuned into yourself. And then with the gratitude piece, you become happier and your day-to-day
Life. Gosh, it’s so good. And I know for anyone who’s listening, who, you know, they’re feeling all the things right now and they’re, they’re not wanting to go through it. I have a lot of conversations with people like that. I know some of our listeners may be there where it’s like the thought of sitting there and facing, it feels like too much, too scary. I was there. I know you’ve probably been there and it’s just, my experience has been like, it will have power over you until you face it, head on and then learning to reconnect with your body. And the way you talked about, I love that, like in the closet, just check in gut, heart, like, how are we doing? How are we feeling? Cause your body’s such an amazing tool and it will tell you everything you need to know to be able to navigate successfully through this world. So that’s incredible.
At least, let me just say one thing real quick. So the, um, initial start to this, a lot of people, it feels clunky, wonky. You’ve never done before. Like anything else, riding a bike, like working out like relationships, like whatever it is, um, give yourself some grace to just everything that you feel any feeling is right. Anything that comes to your head is right. There is no wrong number one. And, and just know that I’ve been doing this type of work for some years. I’ve been on my spiritual journey for my whole life, but I’ve been doing intentional work for the last couple of years, even just yesterday. I was doing some like inner child work and kind of talking to my seven year old Jesse. And like, it’s never easy. It’s never comfortable. You just learn how to surrender. You learn how to not try to hold onto the outcome and release the outcome. You learn to feel the feels and, and use that as a tool to move forward. So even if it’s weird and awkward now it’ll never be easy and the work never stops. So you might as well get on it, get, get pretty proficient at it and just like, enjoy
The ride. It’s so good. It’s so true. It’s so true. It’s like the longer you try to avoid it, the more it’s just going to gain momentum, empower you. And that’s really what I think that’s where the gifts lie is in being willing to face those things we don’t want to look at because there’s always, always, always the lesson, the gift, the thing we need for where we want to go next. So yeah. Thank you. Thank you for sharing that. I want to ask you one final one final question before I do Jessie, where can tell us about where can people find you? I know we’re going to pop a link in the show notes for your link tree, but like tell us about what’s the best way to connect if they want to learn more about what you’re doing, et cetera. So I’ll ask you to do that first.
Yeah. I just want to talk about, uh, the podcast that Jesse T show. So we highlight people like you. I know you’ll be on the show. So entrepreneurs, bad-ass, those people that have been through some that have overcome it and how they could teach people how to do the same thing, authors, athletes, uh, people that you’ve heard of from around the world, people that are local heroes as well. And, um, really just listening to them. I think you, you know, you can hear us talk kinda like this, but then also getting an insight from an expert. That’s interesting. We talk about relationships. We talk about health and wellness, biohacking. We talked about spirituality. We talk about all sorts of fun, interesting things. And so I think that would be a good place for people to kind of get some more information to kind of hear more about what’s going on is the Jesse T show anywhere podcasts can be found. Um, the next place would be on social media. So just follow me at, on, uh, at Jesse, J E S S E underscore T, which is T E so at underscore or at Jesse underscore T and then also on LinkedIn. I do a lot of stuff over there. So it’s Jesse, J E S S E last name two disco, T O D I S C O.
Amazing. Amazing. Thank you. And yeah, this is like, it’s all my favorite things that you talk about. So I’m, I’m so excited for everyone to go connect with you, check out your podcast and your social as well. And so, you know, I think that the final question here, Jesse, is you shared so much about overcoming challenges and the stoicism and the mindset and checking in and rebuilding that connection with yourself. And so if someone is listening and they’re like, oh my gosh, like, I’m definitely going through my own initiation, my own challenges right now. And you had just one final piece of advice to give to them that you think would help shift their mindset, help them in the experience of this. What would that one final piece of advice be to cultivate that resilience?
The first thing is just love yourself and just have some grace for yourself. And then from there, if you want to shift your energy, um, you can literally do things with your body to shift and change your mood. So dance, you can, uh, you can, as this guy, Joseph McLendon, he’s a speaker on the circuit around with like Tony Robbins. He says, shake that,
Get up, get up and shake your. You’re going to feel different. You’re going to feel better about what’s going on. So if you’re in like a funk or stagnant energy,
Move your body, your body holds energy. So you have to move your body. So whether that’s working out, whether that’s dancing, whether that’s playing, like when’s the last time someone played. Right? And especially when you have little kids like I do, and I’m a big kid, so I love the play. But like, who cares? What people think like, like lose the, the, the thought of what’s going on. How am I going to look? How’s this going to feel? Because at the end of the day, we all feel to some degree, you know, whether that’s a little bit, a lot, we all feel awkward. We all feel like duke, can we be accepted? Will we, will we be loved? Will we be judged? Like whatever that is, who gives a? Just do you like if you’re happy dancing, if you’re happy, you know, creating art, I would say, start there, start with what, what makes you happy? So if you’re in a funk or if you’re feeling kind of off, what brings you joy? What sparks joy for you? And then once you figure out what that is, do more of that. And that’ll kind of get you more into a happier place.
Oh my gosh. It’s so good. It’s also good, Jesse. Thank you so much for your vulnerability, for how you have overcome and risen above these challenges and the teacher that you, who you are now, I’m learning so much from you. I know our listeners are learning so much from you and I’m just grateful. I am profoundly grateful for you, my friends. So thank you for being, oh my gosh. Yeah, absolutely. All right. My friends. So go connect with Jesse, listened to the podcast, follow him on social. You were gonna, you’re gonna learn so much from this incredible man. And thank you as always for tuning into she sells radio. We’ll see you next week. Bye for now.