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Demystifying Money with Misty Lynn
When it comes to money, we all have different experiences and different levels of understanding. We all have a different relationship with money, for better or for worse. But today’s guest explains that although financial literacy can seem confusing at first, it is one of the best things you can do for yourself, your family, your business, and your future.
Misty Lynn has more credentials than I can even fit in this introduction. She is the host of the unscripted reality show Heartbreak, the author of Demystifying Money, and hosts a podcast by the same name. She’s an Investopedia top 100 Financial Advisor and the list goes on and on. Ultimately, she’s a money boss and her passion is to help other women understand money and make it work for them in ways you might not think possible.
[2:16] – The financial planning piece of understanding money is the more complex element of earning more.
[3:40] – Misty has really high credentials in the field and in the beginning, she felt that once she had those credentials people would take her seriously.
[5:40] – Misty shared her realization of how she can help others.
[6:56] – It is hard to think about the future sometimes. You have to balance making decisions and being happy in the moment.
[8:32] – Misty explains how she experienced money as a child and learned she wanted to be in financial services.
[10:24] – There are more ways to make money than to work hourly and grind everyday.
[12:15] – Misty saw so many different perspectives of money, specifically the lessons she learned from her father.
[14:23] – Before she took the risk in leaving corporate, Misty had to do some work on her relationship with money.
[16:54] – Money is a place where people tend to give up because it is confusing.
[19:01] – Even when you are in a position you don’t love, you are learning. Don’t discount all of the things you do as a waste of time.
[20:32] – Be curious instead of afraid.
[22:44] – What are the common things that women don’t know before working with Misty?
[24:16] – Misty has worked with women from all walks of life. Knowing your finances is self-care.
[26:19] – A misconception is that men know more about money.
[28:06] – It is okay to want something for no other reason than just wanting it.
[31:09] – There are times when the people in your life won’t understand or agree with your goals.
[33:18] – Misty has a new reality show and shares the concept.
[36:20] – The reality show is helping participants understand money and how they can have what they want.
[37:32] – The network the show is premiering on is combining entertainment and financial literacy.
[39:45] – One of the best things you can do is to understand that the best version of yourself doesn’t exist yet. Take yourself out of that and make the decisions she makes.
Connect with Misty:
Links and Resources:
Instagram | LinkedIn | YouTube
Speaker 1 (00:02):
Welcome to she sells radio. I am so excited for our interview today because if you listen to the show for, I would say at least one episode, <laugh>, you know, that I am all about women making more money and stepping into a whole new level of wealth in their lives. And our guest today is all about that too. Missy Lynch is a certified financial planner who helps high achieving women and families handle their finances with confidence. And she honestly has more credentials than I could fit into the intro, which is a great thing. But I’m so excited to get into the conversation. I’ll give you just a couple quick highlights. She’s the host of the unscripted reality show heartbreak. She’s the author of demystifying money, which is also her podcast. She’s an Investipedia top 100 financial advisor, which is a huge deal. And like I said, lots and lots of credentials that would’ve taken a long time to go through. So we’re so excited to have you on the podcast, Misty. Welcome to she sells radio. Thank
Speaker 2 (01:00):
You so much for having me. I’m excited to be on this show. I love it.
Speaker 1 (01:03):
I am so excited too and already what I love, cuz we were just chatting for a minute in the pre-chat it’s like I think this concept can, or this topic can be so intimidating, right? This topic of money and wealth and finances. And it’s, you know, for me, I go a lot into money, mindset and sales, but the whole financial planning piece and how do we multiply our wealth? That part to me has always felt so much more complex. And um, I mean already, just us chatting for a few minutes in the intro, like you’re so down to earth, you’re so relatable, which I appreciate. And so, um, I know this is gonna be an awesome conversation. So I think let’s start up with a bit of your backstory. So how did I, I know you’re a certified life coach and a certified financial planner. Mm-hmm <affirmative>, which I think is really cool. Like how did these worlds coalesce? How did this come together in your life? Tell us a little bit about that.
Speaker 2 (01:53):
You know, I’m glad that you think it’s cool because I swear when I first, you know, I became a, a CFP in 2011 and you mentioned like having the credentials and I swear that might be because I was a woman in financial services and where I really felt like I had to get as much, you know, as many designations under my belt as much credibility as I could possibly get more so than anybody I worked with was worried about that just because I wanted to be, I wanted to be taken seriously. I wanted people to know that they could work with me and I didn’t look like any of their parents’ financial advisors. And so that was kind of the track I was on. And I did get a lot of different certifications. And in like the, in the investment world, the CFP is pretty much one of the top credentials because you have to, you have to work in the industry, you have to have a degree, you have to pass a at my time, it was like a two day long examination.
Speaker 2 (02:49):
And I thought once I have that people will take me seriously, you know, not realizing and after doing a lot more work on myself, that that was just me kind of delaying going out there, getting clients and asking for business <laugh> was just, wow, not even studying study. So I started to do, you know, quite a bit of work and this might have, this might have come after. You know, when I, you know, I had my kids, I was pretty good in my corporate role. I was making, you know, a lot of money, but I still wasn’t happy. I wasn’t doing what I wanted to do, cuz I really wanted to, you know, be out there working with clients myself instead of being in a corporate office, kind of watching people, supervising people who were out there doing the things that I wanted to do.
Speaker 2 (03:32):
And so I really started to doing a lot of work, coaching work, self coaching, um, and then realized that that was maybe a missing piece in the financial services arena was talking about feelings at all. <laugh> mm. And so I was thinking a lot about what I really wanted my practice to be like my business to be like when I, um, did work in my own firm. And honestly I wanted to kind of get to the root of why my clients made the decisions they make, because I realize, you know, you could tell people, spend X amount of your salary, invest this, do this this way. And they might not do it. <laugh> even if they’re smart, imagine than that intelligent women, they’ve never been that quiet, doing everything like that. They might actually just not do what I’m telling ’em to do. And that was frustrating to a lot of people in the industry, but I realize people make decisions because they wanna feel differently.
Speaker 2 (04:20):
Everything they do is cuz they wanna feel a certain way. And so whether they spend money that they don’t have, or they buy clothes that they think they need or travel or do this, or you know, things for their kids or whatever they’re doing, every purchase, every everything they’re doing is to feel different. And so I really started to study why people behave the way they do and kind of bringing that together so that they can build a life that makes them happy alongside of taking action, which will actually, you know, earn them more money, have them hold onto more money and feel comfortable. Even just being in that space, which for a lot of people, a lot of the people I work with this is like their first exposure to actually having money and being able to do something with it. So yeah, it’s, it’s been really helpful from my opinion. Most people didn’t understand the connection, but you know, I think there’s a lot of time when coaching comes into a lot of the work we do, whether we’re a coach or we’re an teacher, an accountant, whatever, like so much of it is just listening and talking <laugh>
Speaker 1 (05:19):
For sure. For sure. And what I appreciate about what you said, which took me most of my life to get, and once I realized, I was like, oh my gosh, it’s so simple. Literally everything we do is because we think we’re gonna feel a certain way, that’s it, we’re doing it for the emotional payoff. That’s all it is. Mm-hmm <affirmative> right. Yep. And realizing that, but to be able to bring that into your financial planning conversations is, I mean, I, I think I have yet to meet a planner who brings that in. So that’s, that’s very different and very unique. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (05:50):
Because it’s hard to say, you know, think about you 40 years from now, Elise, and you’re gonna be happy about these decisions you made. It’s so hard for our brains to go there. Yeah. That like you might be like, okay, that’s cool. But I really want to take my kids on vacation or I really wanna go to my best friend’s wedding or something like that. Um, because right now is just, what’s on fire. It’s what’s going on right in front of you. And like, so you have to kind of balance making these decisions that will impact your future along with being happy today.
Speaker 1 (06:18):
<laugh> for sure. For sure. Balance. Yeah. And, and I wanna get a little bit into your philosophy around that. Cause I’m all about like the, and in my life, like I think we get to have, I think we get to have it all. Um, but I’m, I’m certainly open for discourse on that, but for you first was this, you know, I, I appreciated and related to what you said at the beginning about going into the industry, getting every designation, getting, and you know, I never experienced that, but I did experience hiding behind a lot of other people who were doing what I wanted to do because I didn’t have enough faith and trust in myself to really lead something on the forefront. And I also know for a lot of women I work with there is the, um, the experience of feeling like, well, lemme just get one more designation, let me get one more certification, then I’ll be ready, then I’ll be valid. So I, so I, I can relate to what you said. I think a lot of our listeners can, did you always know this was the path you wanted to go in life? Did you know you wanted to go into financial services or was it a, like, how did you, how did you get there?
Speaker 2 (07:24):
I think I always, my, my father owned his own business. He still does. Um, and when I was little, we had a lot of money. Like when I was a little, little kid, my father’s business did well. My mom didn’t work. My sister and I had all the toys in the world, the big house, everything we could have possibly wanted. And um, then all of a sudden, when I was around nine years old, my father’s business, um, started to struggle and we moved, everything changed. It seemed like overnight to a kid and my kids are 10 and eight now. So I imagine like how I thought when I was that age. And so it seemed like everything changed things, you know, became more stressful at home. My mom had to go get a job and she had a high school degree. Like she did not, she took whatever job she could get.
Speaker 2 (08:07):
Um, and my father, he never went and got a job. He was just an entrepreneur like that was him. Yeah. And so there was a lot of times where I just thought like, okay, well you just need to figure out how to make money. And that’s the answer like money is the reason why we moved. Money’s the reason why we had to get rid of the dog, why they’re fighting all of these things. And so I guess at like a young age, I just kind of became more aware of money than most people <laugh>. Yeah. Like, and so when I was in school, I thought maybe I’ll be a lawyer. Maybe I’ll be something what’s a job that makes a lot of money <laugh> and I was trying to figure that out. And I really, um, I did like a stock market contest in the sixth grade and I was like, oh, this is it. You just
Speaker 1 (08:51):
Didn’t stock contest. <laugh>
Speaker 2 (08:53):
I lost, I didn’t win. I didn’t even come close. Cuz I thought protopia and I might be aging myself, but I thought protopia was gonna be the big thing for Coca-Cola put all of the, all, everything in there and it didn’t take off. But um, the
Speaker 1 (09:06):
Fact that you even knew what the stock market was is I don’t think I was aware of that. It
Speaker 2 (09:10):
Was a contest. It was a sixth, sixth grade contest where we had newspapers. Yeah. And we pick something and it was just, to me, it was like the, it just, I just remember it being like, wow, there is a way other people do things differently besides going to work, grinding it out, trying to make a paycheck and then giving it away to whatever bill is coming up. Like there’s another way. And I just, I wanted to learn about it. And so I kind of went that route. Um, and then yeah, got a, you know, bachelor’s degree from Yon political science and then went straight into kind of working at an insurance company and started building up all those designations. The thing was when I started working <laugh> and like trying to get clients, um, I felt all of those fears that led me to go keep staying in school and studying, um, I had no money.
Speaker 2 (09:55):
I didn’t have rich relatives to go, you know, try to land <laugh> or convert into sales. Um, everybody wanted to talk to my boss assuming that I wasn’t the advisor that I was his assistant or I was his wife or girlfriend or any conference or meeting I went to, I was just com immediately kind of ignored. And I just went and got a corporate job because, um, I stayed in the industry, but I just wanted to be successful. So I worked in corporate for like 10 years and just, I got the CFP and I knew that I wanted to give advice. I knew that I loved everything about studying for that. And um, it did take me a while to actually leave corporate because it gets comfy
Speaker 1 (10:36):
<laugh> oh, it can be comfy. It’s like stole handcuffs. Yeah,
Speaker 2 (10:39):
It can be, but it was ultimately just always, I knew I was gonna be an entrepreneur. My father trained me to be an entrepreneur. He always had me thinking of things from a business perspective and then from a personal perspective and compartmentalizing the two things. So I was kind of trained by a man to be in business, which was kind of different than a lot of the women I knew <laugh>.
Speaker 1 (10:59):
Mm, yeah. Yeah. For, I mean I grew up and my dad was also an entrepreneur, but mm-hmm <affirmative> it was, we didn’t have a lot of those conversations, you know, I never really learned from him. Um yeah, in that way. So, I mean, it sounds like you got so much from him that you learned and also you saw the bad path. You have both sides.
Speaker 2 (11:16):
I saw the pain. Yeah. And I saw the struggle and I saw the, trying to figure it out cuz there’s no one to go to. There’s no manager to go talk to for help. Right. Or no one to go ask a RA. There was, he had to literally try to recreate his work to fit what was out there and what was needed. And so I saw him studying and reading and doing work and then kind of reinventing the business to work in a different model. And it took time and it was hard cuz there was like very little money coming in at that time. Yeah. Um, and I thought I would never wanna do this, but then I saw that he was at every game of mine, he was always, we were always together. Um, and so that too was kind of like, Ooh, I don’t wanna ask somebody for a day off. My father thought that was disgusting. When he heard that I had to ask for vacation time
Speaker 1 (12:05):
Speaker 2 (12:05):
He was like, okay, go clear it with your boss. Like it was like such like I was like corporate, like it was such a, it was almost like he wasn’t like proud of me for going to get that six figure corporate job. He was kind of like right. Yeah. Sell out
Speaker 1 (12:19):
<laugh> oh my gosh. You know, there’s okay. There’s so many different. Well, first of all, I mean, I think I, I like this band can relate him in a lot, a lot of ways. And there’s, there’s so many paths we could go down here. So I think the first thing I wanna ask about is what did you, you know, in that experience of being in corporate and feeling like you didn’t fit into the mold and feeling like you had to do all the things for validation and people still thinking you’re the secretary, the wife, the girlfriend. I, I know so many women can relate to that cuz that’s probably every conversation I have. We got a lot of women in finance who list and that’s every conversation I have with them, women in male dominated industries. But you finally broke out of that. What did you learn about yourself in the process where you were really ready to stop hiding and start saying like, no, like I’m good enough as I am. Yeah. To go out and do what I wanna do.
Speaker 2 (13:20):
Yeah. I think a lot of it was just realizing and you know, I’d, at that point before I’d, you know, decided to leave and take a risk and go, I, um, I had two children, you know, I, I really was. I knew that the only thing that was holding me back necessarily was me. My, you know, my husband has a nine to five job, had the benefits. Like everything was kind of in place where I wasn’t going to blow up the family I’d saved money. I was really just like the last straw yeah. Was figuring that out. And there was a change and there has been a change in our industry and I’ve been listening and hearing it because I was doing plans for people under the corporate umbrella for a while. Um, and they liked working with me. It wasn’t like they had to work with me that it was a default.
Speaker 2 (14:06):
They actually enjoyed it. And I was building some really close relationships with people and it was, um, you know, it, it was interesting because I wasn’t gathering assets. I was, I was just doing the planning and the advice part. And I realized how much I could help people. Like how many people don’t know what pension option they should choose. They don’t know if they have enough money to retire. They don’t know if they have enough money to buy a house or what credit score even means. I realized in all those years of building up my education and all of that training that I, I, you forget how much you’ve learned and how much more, you know, than somebody. And it’s kind of like when I work with a nutrition person, I don’t know what the heck a macro is when I first, I didn’t know any of that, but they do.
Speaker 2 (14:51):
And so they can kind of tell me things that I don’t know, and I could use it if I’m looking for that kind of help. And money’s the same way. It seems like it’s this elusive confusing thing. But a few people, once I broke down, like, okay, this is, this is why this is important. Does us make sense? People got it. And I started creating content and stuff. Before I left corporate, I was writing blogs and stuff, just taking these like complex things and breaking them down into because I knew the people I was working with were smart. They were really smart, but they were like throwing their hands up in the air. Like I’m so dumb when it comes to money. I have an idiot with this. I don’t know how to, like, they didn’t know how to balance their checkbook. However, they could run like a marketing agency or they could do all of these complicated things where I was like, I think you can. But I think you’ve just been telling yourself for a really long time that you can’t and I don’t believe it. <laugh> like I would just push back and question, why do you feel that way? And a lot of times it was just because like, you know, no one ever taught me this in high school and it’s like, no one ever taught you how to, you know, do a, you know, create a podcast in high school, but here you are, <laugh>
Speaker 1 (16:01):
Speaker 2 (16:01):
Yeah, exactly. You know? And so I think money is a place for people just like to give up because it’s, it’s scary. It’s a lot, it’s a heavy topic. Um, but they’re dealing with it at every day. So eventually they get it kind of, you know, a lot like food, they’re eating every, you get it after a while. It’s not too, it’s not too complicated to figure out how to do a little bit better. And so I realized how much, how much was missing. There’s this huge gap between like wanting people to be confused and think it’s so terrifying and difficult. So they just hand it all over to you. And then, then the people who maybe self taught got themselves outta debt or something and are sharing information on podcasts and TikTok and wherever. And then that gap in between where there’s an actual professional who’s certified. And can still talk about that stuff. It’s a wide open space. There was no one there <laugh>. Yeah.
Speaker 1 (16:51):
So what I is, one of the things I’m hearing from what you said is it’s like, you really looked, you saw the opportunity you saw there’s there’s so you got into service mode, right? Which I think for any of us who are in fear about making a, a, what feels like a bold move or taking a risk, it’s that fear. And I’m sure you talk with your clients about this too. As a coach, that fear always comes from us thinking about ourselves. So you got into service mode, you looked at the opportunity, you looked at how many people needed help mm-hmm <affirmative> and then you said something else. That’s also really important Misty where you said, and this is gonna be paraphrasing, but like you stopped taking your knowledge for granted. Yeah. Which I think so many of us do we think, well, this is easy for me. So of course it’s easy for somebody else forgetting that it’s not, I mean, it’s, it’s, you’ve spent your life mastering it or at least for, you know, maybe someone’s listening and they’ve just been in industry for a couple months or year, but still you’re still have to step ahead of somebody else. Like you’ve got more knowledge than somebody else. So again, I just kinda wanna kind sum up what you said is that, does that sound about right? I am qualified and validated. Yeah. And
Speaker 2 (17:59):
Even all of those jobs, the jobs that I thought I failed at the jobs where they were asking me, like, I was still learning stuff about people. I was learning how people were coming into the office kind of scared or wanting an expert or want, you know, and, and even working in compliant, all of those skills that I learned helped me. Um, and I think that we like to discount all the things that we do to be like, oh, well I wasted my time there, or that was this or this didn’t, this didn’t help me instead of being like, how could I take that and go to that next level that I wanna get to using all of those things even. I mean, there’s probably a lot of people who are changing jobs right now and switching around and feeling like, oh, nothing is fitting.
Speaker 2 (18:43):
Right. Nothing’s clicking. Um, and instead of, you know, being like, why am I such a loser? Like ask yourselves, like what can I do with this? <laugh> cause your brain will find those answers. And if you’re asking it, why am I, so unhireable, why am I, this your brain will give you some, give you some answers, but yeah, it’s asking those different questions. Like, okay, well, how could I, how could I start investing? How could I take this? Which looks like there’s no money left and find money or create money. If something happened to my dog or my child, what would I do to create a hundred thousand dollars or, you know, $500 right now and your brain would go to work. It’s just, we’re not asking ourselves that we’re asking ourselves, why am I so broke? And you’re coming up with a bunch of reasons.
Speaker 1 (19:22):
<laugh> I love this so much. I love this so much. This is, uh, this is so in alignment with what I teach. And I, I think there’s an article on your blog. Something to the extent of be curious, instead of afraid, which I, I wanted to talk with you some about money mindset, cuz that, yeah. I just love talking with women about that. So, so is that what you mean by that? Be curious instead of afraid, like asking, can we ask a better question about yeah. Our money in our wealth? Yeah.
Speaker 2 (19:47):
We have this amazing brain that really doesn’t get sarcasm. It doesn’t understand when we’re joking with ourselves or, you know, saying things. It just, it’s just what it is. And so yeah, if you start to get creative, like, okay, how could I, you know, how could I make this offer better? Or how could I find out what people want? And then you’re like, okay, I could do some re like a lot of these things have been done before and we’ve never had more access to information. And so it was like, okay, if I wanted to write a book, how would I do that? I wanted to start a podcast. So getting really curious, instead of thinking of all the reasons why I shouldn’t do it, you’re too busy. You’ve got this, you’ve got that going on. Like it’s, cause you’ll find answers no matter what. So I really think it’s important for people who want to do something they’ve never done before to kind of take themselves out of that equation. Even if they have to think about like, how would someone do this? Maybe someone who’s not me, how would she get into medicine? How would she get into this field? And then just back into it, kind of with some, some research because our brain likes that that’s easy for us to kind of grasp, instead of thinking about everything, that’s gotten us exactly where we are.
Speaker 1 (20:56):
Mm oh my gosh. It’s, it’s so true. I’m doing enrollment right now for one of my hire ticket programs. And it’s like talking with the women and talking about the questions they’re asking, cuz our brain goes to, what if I fail? What if it doesn’t work? What if I’m, you know, what, if it’s a big mistake and we’ve gotta ask, I mean, we can ask that and sometimes it’s helpful to play it all the way out and say, what if right? Mm-hmm <affirmative> like, what would happen? And can I deal with worst case scenario? But then to your point, what’s a better question to ask. Yeah. And how to, how to use that. So that’s oh, that’s so good. Yes. I, I, I’m curious about for women in particular, so I know you work with high achieving women. That’s our listeners for this show. That’s the majority of them. Uh, what are some of the, what are like one, two, maybe three max things that you think either these women tend to not know coming into, working with you that makes a difference with their money or that really moves the needle for them financially.
Speaker 2 (21:53):
Yeah. I think a lot of times the, the women that I’m talking to, you know, they feel like investments is kind of out of their, their grasp. And I don’t think that they should blame themselves or their mother for that. I mean, my husband was born in 1971. Women couldn’t have a credit card in their own name until 1974. This is an ancient history. Right. Gosh, my
Speaker 1 (22:14):
Mom I’ve heard that and I forgot that that’s crazy. My
Speaker 2 (22:16):
Mom didn’t have a grasp of finances or anything like that. Or my dad didn’t, she didn’t work until she had to like, well, neither did her mom. It just wasn’t the way things were. And so if you don’t have anybody to look to, instead of thinking like, okay, well this isn’t for me find somebody. And sometimes that’s me. Sometimes I’m the woman that’s like, yeah, no, I’ll teach you. I’ll teach you it I’ll, we’ll figure it out together because you’re not gonna necessarily have, it’s not like your boyfriend or your husband has any more financial education than you. It just feels that way. So a lot of times the day to day decisions, paying the bills, women, you know, doing some of the, some of the things that come with the money, the, you know, the little money. Yeah. They’re handling it just fine all the time.
Speaker 2 (23:01):
Um, they’ve seen people do that, but the big money they’re like, oh no, I have him do that. And he might be setting himself up <laugh> and if you don’t understand what’s going on, I talk to a lot of women who stay single intentionally, a lot of women who go through divorces, a lot of women who, you know, they, they need to learn it or else they might have to learn it on their own later in life when it’s absolutely terrifying, there’s fewer options. So I think it’s like, I think women need to understand that knowing your finances is self-care, it is the best form of self-care because then, you know, I want that high ticket coach and I want that program and I know my money and I can afford it and I can do it. Or even if you share money with a, a spouse or whatever, you can say, okay, this is, this is how things look right now. I think we can. And you can actually like, instead of being like, Nope, can’t afford it. Nope. That’s too much money. I can only play with small dollars.
Speaker 1 (23:57):
Speaker 2 (23:57):
And that’s not necessarily true. So I think that’s really important for women to just understand that it’s not painful to learn about your mom it’s yeah. You might have work to do, but like, if you don’t understand it, it’s really terrifying when you actually are now forced to, because of a divorce or a death or something, and then you don’t even know what you’ve got.
Speaker 1 (24:16):
Oh my gosh. For sure. Yeah. I used to be definitely financially avoidant and that was my pattern. Cause it just felt so scary to look at the bank statements or the credit cards. And I didn’t feel, I, I, I felt like I was overspending. I just didn’t know anything. And I remember when I hired a mentor and she was like, okay, you’re serious about hitting seven figures and said yes. And she said, well, millionaires look at their money every day. Yeah. Like if you want your money to grow, you gotta spend time with it. Yeah. And it was that kind of first step into, okay, I’m gonna get really empowered and I’m gonna start to learn this and know this, but you also said something else Misty that I, I don’t know why it was such an aha moment for me, but it really was. I never thought about it this way, where you said your partner, like if you know your, your guy, your husband, your boyfriend, whoever, he doesn’t necessarily have more financial education than you do. No. And I just thought about it as like, oh my gosh, this is so true. I mean, most women aren’t married to financial advisors or financial planners and yet yeah. How often do we just default mode to default? Got it.
Speaker 2 (25:18):
Absolutely. And there’s a lot of guys that are taking a lot of risks cuz they’re like, I wanna, I wanna be in the crypto, the game stop or all of these things. Yeah. And actually some of the, some like some of the studies are showing that women investors are actually a little bit better at, you know, because they’re not trying to get rich quicker time in the market. They’re trying to like make decisions. They can hold onto something. They don’t need to like hear, you know, they’re not necessarily hearing about these hot tips every day or watching the, you know, watching the news, trying to capitalize on it. They’re making a little bit longer strategic decisions. And so there’s really no good reason to necessarily default. It just feels normal because dad took care of this. Yeah. Or grandpa took care of this or uncle was good with money. I swear. Like my biggest competition is like, somebody’s like dad’s best friend <laugh>
Speaker 1 (26:04):
Speaker 2 (26:04):
I’m like, oh, take do for you. Like, I, I like, I I’m certified on this and that. And I’m just like, I gotta talk to this person and I wanna say, what do you think that person is gonna say to you? Yeah. And they’re probably gonna tell me like, oh, you could figure this out yourself. And I’m like, can you, because we’re on the phone.
Speaker 1 (26:19):
<laugh> no. And this is, this is no disrespect. I, I love my dad, but he was that person. He’s like, I do it myself. Like I do taxes myself. I management, why would I pay someone for that? So
Speaker 2 (26:28):
Speaker 1 (26:28):
Do something I could do. And so I, I really struggled for a long time with hiring someone. And when I finally hired someone, it was like, oh, I don’t have that. Everything you get your time back and you’re worth it. I think that’s the, the biggest thing is it’s just, just like anything else, like, could we, I don’t know if we really got fierce about it. Could we learn to build a house if we needed to probably cause that mean it’s the best use of your time. No, I just wanna move in. Yeah. Wanna move in. So <laugh>,
Speaker 2 (26:57):
You know, enough to be like, okay, I don’t need to know it, but I know, I know good people that can do it. And that’s one other thing that I think women should know. That’s important. It’s okay to want something just because you do. And we, oh, we, the cartwheels and the, the, the ways that people try to justify wanting anything where my husband could just be like, I want a new car, cuz they’re cool. I’d have to be like, well the gas mileage and the, in this practice and getting the kids here and it’s gotta be this and it’s gotta be smart. And I have to like build a, like a case, like I’m going to court to want anything. And that’s something that I hear women doing all the time when I feel like it’s okay to be like, I wanna get my hair done.
Speaker 2 (27:34):
Just because I feel like it period. And I don’t care. Like, because if you know your money, you can do that. If you don’t know your money, you are gonna force yourself to be like, is this a worthwhile decision? Is this like a good investment? Is this better for somebody else too? And guys don’t have to do that because they’ve just been taught like, okay, this is money. It comes, it goes, you use it, you spend it, you whatever. Um, where women have really like, it’s kind of a hard habit to break, to feel like, okay, well I’m gonna get this coach. What if it doesn’t work out? What if I’m not instantly a seven figure person? I can’t do it. I can’t no way. Instead of thinking like, okay, worst case, I learn a lot. Yes. And then I keep cracking at it. Oh no. And I learn something and it’s good. It’s good investment. It’s good for me. I’m gonna do it. It’s a lot of that. Like trying to figure out who else is going to benefit because just, you doesn’t feel like enough, but it is
Speaker 1 (28:26):
<laugh>. Aw. But it
Speaker 2 (28:27):
Speaker 1 (28:28):
<laugh> we could, we could spend five hours talking about what you just said. Cuz it’s literally been so many of my conversations this morning. It’s like you’re reading women’s minds. There’s I’ve gotta justify it. I’ve gotta go to this person. I gotta get approval from that person. Mm-hmm <affirmative> and is this, I wanna make sure you said it’s okay to want something just because you want it. Yes, period. And it’s it’s
Speaker 2 (28:48):
It’s okay to want like completely frivolous. Like I, I mean I wanted somebody to, I wanted to hire somebody to help clean my house because it’s not my favorite thing to do. It was like punishment when I was a kid and it still is. And so my husband’s not exactly like love. Like we don’t clean for fun or anything. It doesn’t relieve stress. And so, oh my God. When I said to like my mom that I was gonna, I was gonna hire someone to do it. She was just like, terrified that I couldn’t like keep my own house, plus have a business end, a podcast and a B and a job and two kids or whatever. And a husband that I wanna spend time with. And I was like, I felt no guilt whatsoever. Like none
Speaker 1 (29:23):
Speaker 2 (29:23):
She just looked to me like I was insane because I could do it myself. I don’t wanna, I want that time back. I like hiring what I like hiring and putting other people to work. I love paying people to help me do things that I don’t wanna do. And I felt good about it. And she was just like, that feels, that just seemed like bad, but it’s not, it’s just not
Speaker 1 (29:44):
It’s. So, you know, it’s so in our DNA that we have to be able to do it all. And we just did this in my family. We just hired our first full-time personal employee to help with house. And she, I mean, this woman does, she’s like wonder woman. She takes care. She school’s our son. She takes care of the house. She’s my personal assistant. She does all, she’s incredible. She’s a phenomenal person to boot. But I have to tell you, there was like so many parts of me that felt like, who were you to do this? No one in your family has ever done this. Nope. You could be. And I I’ve been trying to do all those things on my own before plus running the business, plus like grocery shopping, errs, birthdays holidays. And literally now that she’s only been working with us a few weeks full time, but it’s like, I don’t know how in the world I thought I was gonna do all those things had run. The like stuff is actually getting done before it wasn’t I was stressed out. I was not a great, oh
Speaker 2 (30:39):
Yeah. Your mind is somewhere else. When you’re here. You’re thinking about, yeah. Things that should be happening instead of being like, Nope, someone’s taking care of that. Okay. That’s happening. And like you’re also employing somebody and like meaningful work for somebody else to do. I mean, that’s a big thing and I think it’s wonderful. And I think that we kind of, yeah. Feeling like we could do everything ourselves is crazy. I don’t know any, I don’t know anybody who’s ever asked me, husband like, oh, well who’s taking the care of the kids while you’re at work. Who’s doing this. They don’t ask him those questions. And so it’s kind of like, and this could be a lot of the things that happened when I was grown. Cause I was basically like, yeah, like I was like, there was just no sons for my to talk to.
Speaker 2 (31:17):
So there was me, my sister wanted to be a teacher, her whole life. She was like, I know really care about this business crap. Yeah. But basically it was just kind of like, okay, yeah. Like your, your value and your time are, are they have their own value, like your brain and your time and spending time doing this, it looks like I’m not doing anything to everybody else, but I am, I’m learning something where other people would be like, oh, get a job or what are you doing? And so I realize like my time is better spent doing things that bring in X amount of dollars than being able to pay somebody $50 an hour to, you know, do some VA work or stuff like that. And like, so that, to me made sense, even though I could do it myself, but it would be slow and I would be really burnt out.
Speaker 1 (32:01):
Exactly. Oh my gosh. Exactly. So I’m so curious about your new reality show. Yes. For a number of reasons. One I’m like, okay, this is really exciting. <laugh> yes. Yeah. I mean a lot of our listeners, like number one, they’re they’re gonna wanna learn about it and I know they, so they also have a vision of doing some sort of bigger branding and marketing for themselves. So can you speak a little bit to the show and also speak about how it came to fruition? Cuz I, I just think this is so cool and exciting. So yeah.
Speaker 2 (32:29):
Yeah. So this show, so million stories, media and the Singleton foundation put together this idea for a show where they would talk with couples who were having like frights and stress about money. And they wanted to bring in somebody who they were thinking of bringing in two people, they were thinking of bringing in a therapist and bringing in a financial advisor and um, to kind of count work with the couples on how they were thinking and feeling and then like the tactical, how they can do better. And so there was a, literally a cast and call on Instagram. And my friend, Emily, who I used to work with in corporate was like, they’re looking for you. Oh. And she flipped it to me. And this was during, during COVID. I mean, this was during lockdown pandemic and my like little extroverted heart was like, Hey LA, like what’s I, so I sent a message to this casting person and I just said, Hey, my friend sent this to me.
Speaker 2 (33:22):
Um, I think I might be able to help you. And I did a bunch of interviews on zoom. I think my, like my whole family was like, this sounds crazy. Like, is this a real thing? Are you gonna end up like getting on a bus to LA somewhere and like being, you know, take? And I’m like, I don’t really think I’m the target market, like 42 year old mother of two for human trafficking, but got, I got their fears. Yeah. And so I ended up being like, they realized they didn’t need to get two people that I could work with these couples and talk with them about what’s going on in their relationship. Why that, you know, what they’re feeling, what they’re thinking. And I talk to each of ’em together separately, and I looked at the money and I looked at what was actually going on and what they were telling me they wanted to do versus what they were doing.
Speaker 2 (34:07):
And so that show kind of came, came about. So I flew out to LA in January, um, spent like three weeks working with these couples. And then I flew back again in March to see how they were doing kind of like a follow up visit to see if things had started to change. And it was just a really fun experience. I mean, cuz these people are super relatable. I mean, some of them, you know, married with kids, others were dating, they’re living, you know, a lot of them are living in pretty high cost of living areas, feeling like I can’t even get my head above water. And instead of just being like, I gotta work through it. Like, you know, what about what if we moved? And it was like, oh I can’t do that. But then it’s like, well, what if you did? Where would you go?
Speaker 2 (34:52):
Mm. And like, what if you bailed on this whole idea and they, you just weren’t thinking like, because we, we always do the same thing that we’ve always done. Like I don’t think about how I take my coffee every morning. I just go and get it. And so these people were just like, oh well, and some of them did make some big, big changes and maybe they felt like they had to put their dreams off a little longer, which was painful and horrible for me to be like, Ooh, they might not be able to do this this year. But if we do it next year and being able to show them the reports and the visuals helped people be like, oh, I don’t wanna do that. I don’t wanna bankrupt my family. I don’t wanna be this. But if I wait two years longer and things look beautiful or if I start investing a little bit now and things look really good, then that kind of helped them be like, okay, maybe, maybe we should do it. So it was really kind of tackling both those ends of it because like, you know, all the talk of like, you know, coaching and manifesting and stuff like that is great, but there needs to be action.
Speaker 1 (35:46):
Speaker 2 (35:46):
<affirmative> you need to change. Um, and like start things moving to then open up, you know, what what’s possible. And for a lot of them, it was the first experience they had kind of even talking to anybody about money or each other about money. Like, because as soon as they some couples, man, one money comes up, the other person avoids bails and then the other one’s just like angry. And so it was really fun. So I worked with them and that’ll be, you know, it’s, we’re gonna premiere it in September at the end of September. And um, it’s gonna be on million stories, media, they have their own network. They have a couple awesome shows. Like if you, if you don’t follow them already, they have Richard Sherman does adulting, which is super ado. Like he talks about like, you know, coming into money and all of the basic things he had to learn and do. And so they’re really trying to combine, um, entertainment with financial literacy because in financial literacy is a little dry <laugh>
Speaker 1 (36:39):
It can be, I think you prove today that it doesn’t have to be though, which it can be awesome.
Speaker 2 (36:44):
Yeah. And so if you really try to get people to, like, I cared so much, I, I mean, some of the people, like I know that like that people who watch it are just gonna love these people and want it to work. And it had like, you know, there’s some stuff that people told me about that I, they didn’t even know the producers didn’t even know they were gonna say, or didn’t know happened in their past. And it’s just like, we all have this stuff that’s yeah. From so long ago that’s impacting everything we do now. Wow. And we just gotta face it. We gotta kind of figure it out. I know that I’ve got stuff <laugh>
Speaker 1 (37:15):
Speaker 2 (37:15):
I kinda lean with it and I’m like, yep. That was really hard. And this is stuff I’m trying to figure out, but it’s all a work in progress. So yeah. So that’s what the show’s focus is. And it really was just a random Instagram thing where instead of feeling like, well, they’re not gonna want me, I can’t leave the house for three weeks. I can’t figure out. It was like, well, how could I make this work?
Speaker 1 (37:36):
Ask of better questions. Yeah. That’s so exciting. That’s so exciting. And the show is called heartbroken, heartbroken. Right. <laugh> okay. Heartbroken a million stories. Media. That’s super exciting. So I’ll tune in. I encourage everyone to tune in that’s that’s so cool. So yeah, this has been amazing. This has been like, and I have so many friends in finance and I love everybody. Like this has been one of the most fun conversations I’ve ever had.
Speaker 2 (38:03):
Speaker 1 (38:04):
And money and how to elevate our wealth consciousness. So tell us, so Misty two final questions, number one, where can people connect? So whether they want to buy your book, whether they wanna check out the podcast, learn more about the show, what’s the best way to connect with you?
Speaker 2 (38:16):
Sure. The easiest way to find me is, um, just to go to Misty lynch.com. I think there’s links to the podcast. The book, the TV show will be once it’s out, it’ll be listed up there. And then on, uh, social media, I’m just Misty Lynch, CFP pretty much everywhere. Okay. So it’d be fun to connect with you all there.
Speaker 1 (38:31):
Amazing. And then final question. What would you say, what’s your number one money mindset or wealth tip for ambitious women who are going for their dreams claiming more for their lives and just really done playing small.
Speaker 2 (38:46):
Yeah. I think for them, one of the best things that they can do is to try to, you know, the, the version of themself that they’re trying to become. It doesn’t exist yet. There’s no proof, there’s no proof that you can be this seven figure business owner. That’s got the life and the friends and the family, there’s a million people telling you, you can’t have that all. Um, but I think that what you have to do is kind of take yourself out of that and start to think about like, what decisions would I make if I was already her, if I already had that seven figure business, if I was a six figure business owner and I wanted to hire this coach, cause I thought she could help me. What would I say? And if that’s an instant yeah, of course I would do it.
Speaker 2 (39:24):
Getting to kind of think about yourself in that future role, being that, that future version of you thinking like her now can help you. Because right now all of the things that we’ve done have gotten us to where we are and we like it. Our brain’s trying to keep us alive. It’s not trying to make us a seven figure business. One, it’s trying to keep us alive and it doesn’t wanna make us happy. So you kind of have to trick it and think like, okay, well, you know, would I fire that client? If they treated me poorly? If I had a full caseload of full book clients that I loved, of course you would. But we think, you know, we kind of get caught in scarcity when we’re on our way there. So I think that’s one of the best things that people can do is just to try to picture themselves as that, as that person today and start making decisions like that person. And then eventually it’s just, you, it’s just, you
Speaker 1 (40:11):
<laugh>, that is, it’s just your life, the best piece of advice ever. Yeah. That’s so powerful. That’s so powerful. Missy, this has been so much fun. We are. I mean, I’ve just, I’ve, I’ve really, really, I’ve grown so much listening. We’re so aligned in terms of philosophy, what like how we operate and do business. And I’m just so grateful, uh, for you coming on. And I’m so excited for everything you’re doing to touch so many lives around the world and how many more lives are gonna be touched with the TV show and the continued growth of the book and the podcast. So thank you for what you’re doing and for coming on and sharing the message much. Yes, absolutely. And to you, my listener go connect with Misty. This is, um, I mean, what she’s bringing is it’s kind of like the, she sells version of financial planning.
Speaker 1 (40:58):
<laugh> for lack of better words, my listeners will know. We, we care all about abundance. We care all about stepping into our greater lives. We care about the mindset piece. And so this is resonating 100% with who I am, what I believe what I know our listeners believe too. And so I think this is just so aligned with, um, with what all of our listeners care about. So go connect with Misty by her book, get excited to tune into her TV show, um, connect with her on social and give her some love for coming on at this show today and let her know, um, let her know what your biggest takeaway was. Thank you so much for being a listener of she sells radio and I’ll see you on our next episode. Bye for now.