While it might not seem obvious why today’s topic is at the core of your success, it’s a major aspect of achieving your income goals and learning to sell in a way that is authentic to you. On this episode, we’re talking about trusting yourself. Suppressing emotions, negative internalization, and societal pressures can hold you back from accomplishing what you’re here to do. Our guest today is Samantha Skelly, a seven-figure entrepreneur, speaker, and wellness coaching expert. She’s here today to talk about breathwork and the depths of understanding and trust it can take us.
Samantha’s journey included an incredibly difficult relationship with food. There was a deeply rooted distrust of herself in regards to food. She wasn’t sure if she’d be able to handle the outcome. Her connection with uncertainty was a stress point. She lived with relentless self-doubts and inner criticisms that bled into every aspect of her life. Eventually, she hit a point where she lost sight of who she was. When you live without that trust and don’t have a healthy relationship with uncertainty, Samantha says, you force yourself to live only with what is known–and that’s a fraction of what’s possible. Now, with determination and resilience, it’s clear that intuition is trustworthy and it’s easier to take risks. Because no matter what happens, you will persist. When you can’t handle the ‘no’ it’s impossibly hard to chase the ‘yes.’ When you don’t attach your self-worth to rejection, you’re free to achieve.
Starting the process of learning to trust ourselves can be daunting. Samantha says it’s en embodied experience. Living through change is the only want to truly witness it. She breaks it down into three pillars of connection: mind, emotions, and intuition. Using techniques like mediation, breathwork, or whatever it is, we can really tap into the intuition aspect at a foundational level, that opens pathways to trust. In doing that, you can ask and answer so many questions of yourself and understand that the signals you feel are worth listening to. Because we have so much evidence from our mind and intelligence, it tends to override intuition. But with work, those moments are lead with in-tune actions.
So, how do you know what a “yes” and “no” feels like? Samantha suggests starting with a definite “yes” question. Then, ask a definite “no.” Begin to feel the contractions in the system. Your body knows the answer before your mind does. It takes time to reclaim a relationship you’ve lost for a long time. It’s good to create a commitment to coming home to ourselves, feelings awaken. Be gentle!
A big player in reconnecting with trusting yourself is making peace and becoming comfortable with uncertainty. Especially right now, it’s abundant. Samantha says it’s about managing your variables. Finding and creating a felt sense of safety emotionally is essential. Without it, it’s challenging to go out on a limb because you don’t have that trust built in your body. She uses breathwork to work on rooting herself in stabilizing her understanding that worthiness isn’t tied to rejection or failure. Know what your essential, concrete needs are in place, you can relax. Emotionally, know that you have internal stability that will remain no matter what’s thrown at you.
The path to healing is in no small part driven by your relationship with anxiety, Samantha mentions. It’s not who you are, but has a message and lesson that we can learn from. When you experience it, ask yourself what it is you need. How can you lean into the source and ask it? Learning acceptance of it, as opposed to resisting it, allows you to understand what its cause is and allows you to toggle in and out of it when there is something to learn.
Samantha practices and teaches breathwork. This practice helps you unhook your mind and get into the body to access intuition. For her, breathing is the path of least resistance to that. First thing in the morning, before bed, and throughout the day, breathing is a tool to recenter. Two breaths in through the chest and belly and out through the mouth, followed by a deep breath in, holding it at the top, and releasing. Just that is enough to shift the energy and clear your mind.
Tune in to go through a breathing exercise with Samantha at the end of today’s episode and try it for yourself!