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Superhuman Selling Episode 402: Become an Unforgettable Speaker: Storytelling, Confidence & Influence with Mary Van Dorn
Whether you’re presenting in a boardroom, selling to a prospect, hosting a podcast, or speaking on a stage, communication is one of the most powerful skills you can develop. Yet for many high-achieving professionals, speaking still brings up fear, resistance, and self-doubt.
In a recent Superhuman Selling episode, I sat down with communication expert Mary Van Dorn, who has spent over 30 years helping executives, entrepreneurs, and sales leaders become unforgettable speakers. What she shared goes far beyond technique — it’s about presence, purpose, and understanding the psychology of your audience.
These are the biggest takeaways and practical tools you can apply today.
1. Stage Fear Isn’t the Problem — The Focus Is
Most people think they’re nervous because they’re speaking. But Mary explains the real issue: your attention is on yourself, not your audience.
When your heart is on service, you cannot be nervous.
This principle shifts your entire energy. Instead of worrying about being judged, messing up, or forgetting your lines, you begin thinking about the one person in the audience who needs your message the most. Suddenly, the fear dissolves — because you’re not performing, you’re serving.
2. Stop Speaking to the Critics in Your Head
Many speakers unintentionally write or speak for the “imaginary critic.”
The executive in the suit.
The colleague who always has feedback.
The client who may disagree.
But Mary reminds us that these critics aren’t real — and even if they were, they’re not who your message is for.
When you hold back to avoid judgment, your message loses impact. When you speak your truth, the right people hear you more clearly and lean in.
3. Your Audience Is Not Who You Think
One of Mary’s most powerful stories comes from a presentation where she assumed someone in the front row wasn’t paying attention. He was looking at his phone the entire time.
At the end?
He walked up to her and said he couldn’t stop taking notes.
The lesson: you cannot read an audience by their facial expressions.
Someone frowning might be deeply resonating. Someone looking away might be processing. Someone expressionless might be having a breakthrough internally.
Stop judging your audience — you’re almost always wrong.
4. Storytelling Increases Retention by 22x
Facts alone don’t move people.
Stories do.
When you wrap a fact inside a story, your audience becomes 22 times more likely to remember it. That’s why the most effective speakers weave personal experiences, client stories, metaphors, and lived examples into their content.
Information informs.
Stories transform.
5. Prepare Your Body Before You Prepare Your Slides
Mary recommends physically moving — dancing, shaking out your hands, raising your heart rate — before speaking.
Why?
Movement reduces cortisol, increases energy, and brings you into an excited (not anxious) state. It also helps you shift into presence so you can connect more authentically with your audience.
Try this before your next meeting or presentation:
• 30 seconds of movement
• Three deep breaths
• Repeat: “I’m excited.”
It changes everything.
6. The Biggest Mistake in Sales Presentations
Mary says the number one mistake is simple:
People don’t ask for the sale.
They teach.
They explain.
They present.
But they never actually ask.
Confidence comes from clarity — and your audience wants direction. When you clearly guide them toward the next step, they feel more supported, not pressured.
Becoming a powerful communicator doesn’t require perfection. It requires presence. It requires service. It requires being willing to speak authentically without shrinking for imaginary critics.
Mary’s wisdom is a reminder that great speakers aren’t born — they are made. And you can start becoming one today by shifting your focus, anchoring into purpose, and speaking from the heart.
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