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How to Increase the Good You Allow in Your Life

 

Oftentimes we don’t allow ourselves the things we truly want. And even more often are the times we don’t even know we’re doing that to ourselves. In today’s solo episode, we’re talking about how the good in your life will come when you allow it. This is an important concept because it really goes against the things we’ve been taught. We are told that it is selfish to want certain things or experiences or because of our learned relationships with money, those nice things aren’t for you. 

 

But take a moment to think about your self-worth. Sometimes it is not the need for a new script or sales funnel. Upleveling your self-worth and the amount you’re willing to allow will cause a ripple effect of amazing opportunities to flow into your life. So listen on to this episode of She Sells Radio for my three steps to notice your resistance and take the right actions to feel good. How good are you willing to let life get?


Show Notes:

 

[1:47] – A client texted a photo to Elyse that inspired the topic of this episode.

[2:52] – Your income will never exceed your level of self-worth.

[4:29] – The magic happens when you uplevel the amount you’re willing to allow.

[5:58] – Referring to a recent episode, Elyse realized that her heaviness was a mirror of something she needed to work on. She didn’t realize what she wasn’t allowing.

[7:32] – You know you’re in a higher vibrational place, the things you want will come in really fast.

[8:12] – Challenges are always preparing you for your next uplevel.

[8:56] – The first step is simply to notice. We live most of our lives in unawareness.

[9:44] – Elyse explains why you should notice your money rules.

[12:28] – Your desire for nicer things or experiences is not selfish.

[14:08] – Notice where in your life you are not allowing the things you want.

[15:34] – It is so difficult to decide what is most important for your time.

[17:02] – Elyse shares why she scaled back on work to spend time with her son because that is where she was experiencing the most resistance.

[18:27] – Generate clients when you are being yourself. This could be a challenging reframe for you, like it was for Elyse.

[19:53] – Because she wasn’t allowing in the possibility of working less, she hadn’t realized the impact it would have on her business.

[22:23] – The next step is to create belief systems that support you. DM Elyse for a link on how to rewire your belief systems.

[24:21] – Money always shows up to support your expansion.

[25:16] – With money, use the word “invest” and not “spend.”

[27:07] – To overcome her blocks and rules with money, Elyse had to anchor herself in the idea that she deserved to spend the money on the things she wanted.

[28:10] – People who have the things they want, allow themselves to have them.

[30:01] – Looking back on an experience with a photographer, Elyse shares the lesson she learned in how unwilling she was to have the thing she wanted.

[31:16] – The third step is to relax and focus on feeling good.

[32:44] – Your emotions are telling you what vibrations/frequencies you match with.

[33:56] – Look outside less and look inside more.

[34:51] – Negative emotions create friction and resistance.

[36:32] – When you feel good, you will match with what you want. 

[38:04] – When Elyse started shifting her emotions, huge life and financial uplevels were allowed.

[39:20] – Once you allow it in, the opportunities will come in fast.

 

Links and Resources:

Instagram  |  LinkedIn  |  YouTube

 

She Sells with Elyse Archer Home Page

Elyse (00:02):

Welcome to she sells radio. All right, my friend this week, I’ve got another solo episode for you, which we’re getting back into interviews for next week, but I’ve actually had so much fun doing these solo episodes. And I think I’m going to do some more. So I hope you’ve been enjoying them. And I’ve also got amazing guests, amazing guests coming up for you, um, starting next week too. But today what I want to talk with you about is a topic that was actually inspired by a text I received from a client, uh, just a couple of days ago. And we’re talking today about how to increase the good and the abundance that you allow into your life. And yes, I want you to pay attention to that word allow. And so I received this text from a client, um, just a couple of days ago and she sent me this picture of it was her and her husband and they were out shopping and they, you know, they’ve clearly they’d had so much fun.

Elyse (00:58):

They had their shopping bags out like big smiles. Um, and she said, when you decide that money is fluid, and as I talk about it, um, as I been talking about it, now I get chills because I know how much this woman like, like myself and like other clients who I get to serve have had to create new belief systems about what we’re willing to allow in and what we are willing to receive and decide that we are worthy of. And I know it wasn’t always that way for her. And it definitely, wasn’t always that way for me either. And so part of why this matters so much for those of us who are selling, right? Whether you’re an entrepreneur, whether you’re a sales professional, or maybe you’re selling your ideas to your team, but we’re all in sales, your income will never exceed your level of self worth.

Elyse (01:53):

So if you’re taking notes, I want you to write that down. Your income will never exceed your level of self worth. And oftentimes the thing that is limiting that next level of income of sales, of financial abundance in your life, it’s not that you need a better funnel or a better script, although maybe, maybe we’re always over here and she sells world. We’re always working on getting better there and tweaking and improving those. But what I’ve noticed in my own experience is I can tweak them. I can tweak and tweak and tweak the funnel until it can be no more. But if I’ve got any energy of resistance around receiving more, it doesn’t matter. It doesn’t work. But when I learned what I’ve learned, and it’s a conscious thing, and it’s a decision I make every day and some days are better than others. Um, but when I really allow, when I learned to just sit back and receive and allow and feel worthy of receiving the clients, the money, the opportunities, the happiness and joy that I desire.

Elyse (02:57):

That’s when those DMS come in from people who are like, Hey, I’ve been watching you for a long time and I want private coaching with you, or, Hey, I, you know, I need to do I’ve, I’ve been hanging out on the sidelines and now I’ve decided I need to jump in and work with you. How can we do it? And that’s how that is how it works. So your income will never exceed your level of self worth. And so this, this conversation today on this podcast is about upleveling, the upleveling, your self-worth and upleveling, the amount that you’re willing to allow into your life. Um, because when we do that, when we have higher expectation for ourselves, for how much money we make for how our clients work with us and for what we’re, you know, we’re available for unavailable for that’s when things start to really shift and get exciting in our lives, that’s when the real magic happens.

Elyse (03:49):

And when I think about allowing and what that, what that looks like, one of my mentors used to say, and I love this. And I think about it all the time, how good are you willing to let life get? How good are you willing to let life get? And it’s not about, you know, how hard are you going to work to get a little bit more, but it’s how willing, how, how good are you willing to let life get? So shout out to Gina Dovie for being the first person who really made me think that way. And I want you to think about that word willing. So how much are you willing to allow in your life and, you know, part of why this, this was inspired as well? I shared on last week’s podcast, if you listened to it about how this past summer, so a few months ago, you know, the energy around certain areas of my life, I noticed felt stagnant and they felt, it felt heavy.

Elyse (04:48):

And to me, anytime that’s happening, it’s a beauty. It’s not fun in the moment, but it’s a mirror back of how I’m being. And I noticed in that moment, I was like, okay, there’s clearly some inner work that needs to be done here, because this is just all being neared back to me of some places where I’m not willing and not allowing more in not allowing in what I want. That’s why it feels heavy and feels like a slog in some ways. And so I did, I did that inner work. I kind of went back to deepening the practice of meditation and deepening my affirmations and writing a new life script and listening to it over and over again. And then like I shared on the podcast last, we can go back and listen to it if you haven’t yet. But, um, so much flu, actually I think if you’re listening to this in sequential order, it’s two, I guess, episodes ago.

Elyse (05:37):

Um, but so much started happening so fast because I had kind of like removed the cork that was blocking things, if that makes sense. And so, boom, boom, boom. Is this just a couple of days ago as I record this, my husband took his, his M cat. The next day we sold our house. The following day, we sold one of our, both for more than we thought that we were going to get for them. And now we’re, you know, we signed this lease on this beautiful new place that we’re going to be living in, in North Carolina for about nine months. Um, and it’s a total, it’s a, it’s a dream place. And I had to really work on, and this is the work. The work is the inner work is the allowing those types of things to come in quickly. Because actually that is so I want you to think about in your own life, when have things felt stagnant and stuck.

Elyse (06:26):

And then when have things just come in really fast for you and, and the things coming in fast. And when I say things coming in fast and saying what you want coming in fast clients, money opportunities, et cetera. That’s when you’re in that higher vibrational place, right? That’s those common, you know, it, if you start to track it, if you haven’t yet, and you’ll start to notice it when you’re in that place of allowing and receiving like Abraham Hicks as the art of allowing, because it is an art when you’re in that energy and in that place, those things you want, they come in in ways that feel really fast, but that’s actually, that’s your norm. And it’s not that, you know, our whole life here is going to be one where it’s just everything you want comes and continuously, continuously, continuously, and there’s never any challenges along the way, because the challenges are always preparing you for that next up level.

Elyse (07:15):

So those are normal. The rhythm of your emotions is normal too, so that it’s not an indication that anything is wrong, but when things feel slower or when they feel harder, when we, what you want is not coming in, what that means, is there some sort of, you’ve got some sort of a block on allowing in what you desire and it’s, and then it’s like, okay, it’s your invitation to go to work at figuring out what that block is and how to release it. Okay. And so that’s what I want to talk with you about, um, on the podcast today is how do you do that and how do you increase your capacity to allow more in? And so there’s three steps that I want to take you through today. And the first is just to notice, it’s just to notice, because so much of our life, we spend an unawareness because we just kind of think things are what they are.

Elyse (08:07):

I don’t know about you, but for me, for most of my life, I had no idea that I was in full control of everything that was happening to me. And because of that, cause I didn’t know that I would try to control everyone and everything around me, but it was from a very, um, anxious, gripping energy. So this is, this is different, right? This is a different kind of control, which is more about controlling your inner state. But I just want you to notice and take note of a couple core things here that are going to indicate to you how much you are willing to allow or not allow into your life. And I would notice, I would notice what your money rules are, you know, and I’ll give some context for those. But a lot of times, you know, we pick up on money behavior and money rules from our parents or the people who raised us.

Elyse (08:56):

And we don’t even realize that we’re, that they are creating our reality for us because we’re living according to a belief system that may not serve us. And so growing up in my family, we were, we were upper middle class, you know, we, we had money for sure. Um, we, we always had luxury cars. We had nice homes, but we always clip coupons. And there was a year where my mom tracked everything. We spent down to the penny and kept a log book of it. And I remember, um, and I never really put two and two together, but there was this kind of feeling that I then took into my adulthood of we have money, but we don’t and we have money, but it could all go away and you have money, but you gotta be really cheap or else you won’t have it. And so I don’t know if I would really think about back to your childhood, like what were the money rules that you saw your parents demonstrate?

Elyse (09:56):

And they were just, again, they were doing the best they could with their own belief system. And they, you know, for most of us, our parents didn’t have podcasts or a lot of information like this. They weren’t, at least my parents weren’t paying attention to information like this. And so they were, you know, they were just doing the best they could with what they had. And they did great in so many ways, but that was definitely a money rule. I picked up on that. I then took with me into my adulthood. And even though I always made enough money to pay bills and like to really have what I wanted, there was always an anxiety and a fear around it going away. Um, I had strange rules about like, I can buy work clothes because that’s how I got my value was when I was working.

Elyse (10:39):

That was how I felt safe and secure. Cause that was, I was like, I’m making money so I can invest back into nicer work clothes. Um, but not too nice. Right. It was like express. Like I would shop at express all the time, which is no, no dig on express it’s it’s great clothing, but I would never dream of buying like a designer. Um, I would never allowed myself to buy anything like that. Um, designer clothing. And so, but then I couldn’t invest on workout clothes because I didn’t value that part of myself as much. So I’d go to target and buy the cheap workout clothes. And so I picked up on, um, you know, these, these materials where it was like, I was always, and I always wanted nice things. That’s just, you could probably relate to that. Right. And we make ourselves wrong for that to where we want the luxury car, we want to travel first-class we want to do the VIP experience, but we say, oh, that’s for somebody else or, oh, I’m just being greedy.

Elyse (11:38):

And it’s really not. It’s your desire for those things is just the spirit in you. So God’s spirit in you wanting fuller expression. You live in a physical world. There’s a reason why everything is physical because that’s how you experience yourself here is by having that physical experience. But I would really make myself wrong for wanting to have any, you know, any sort of, I had boundaries around what I was willing to spend and what I wasn’t willing to spend on things, if that makes sense. And, um, I was always wanting more, but not allowing more in and it always felt hard, right. It always felt like I had to work so hard to make money. And I, my relationship with how many came in was the more hours I worked and the more aggressive I was, the more money would come in and I didn’t really stop and pay attention to the fact that for about 10 years of living that way, although I was making, you know, a hundred thousand, 120,000 a year, what it, which is, which is good money, but you’re not going to go live your best life on that.

Elyse (12:40):

No matter how hard I worked, I always made that much. Okay. And so just notice those money rules and what they are. I have clients girlfriends who would just notice stuff like, oh, I’ve got a money rule. Like I can only spend X amount on groceries every week, or I can only, I can buy, you know, the nice brand, but not the full designer brand. Okay. So just, just notice zero judgment, zero judgment on it, but just noticing, cause that’s going to tell you the amount so far that you’ve been willing to allow into your life. Okay. I noticed where you’re not allowing what you want to come in as well. And here’s another example because it doesn’t just have to do with money. You know, it has to do with, with time and experiences and freedom as well. And our son now, as I record, this is, um, he’s like 13 and a half months.

Elyse (13:33):

And this past spring, you know, I was really kind of in what felt like that squeeze of our businesses really growing. And there was a lot of new responsibility that I was taking on as leader of this company. And, um, new team members were hiring a new processes, putting it like lots and lots of lots on the work and lots on the Workfront, but yet I’ve got this, you know, little five month old, six month old that I desperately want to spend more time with. And I found myself in this tricky place that I think a lot of moms can relate to being in. And I remember talking to, um, talking to my coach about this and feeling like I couldn’t reconcile both of those desires. I wanted more time with my son. I wanted to be present for him growing up. And I also wanted to be really successful at work.

Elyse (14:24):

And I just want to also acknowledge, like I knew that it’s such a common thing. And I remember in that moment, like how heart-wrenching things felt like where I felt like I had to decide between whether we were going to, you know, hit the financial targets for that month or whether I was going to have time with my son. And so I, and I had it, I think I was closing out work around three o’clock every day. So it’s still like, you know, better hours than many women who are working full-time in the workforce, right. Or even if you’re, maybe you’re an entrepreneur and running your own business, but you’re burning the candle at both ends. So it was still definitely for me, less hours than I was used to working. But it, there was a lot that was happening, happening in his life that I wasn’t seeing.

Elyse (15:09):

Um, and I, I felt like I don’t know how to reconcile both of these. And I felt a lot of tension in that desire. So I was talking with my coach and I said, I think, you know, for us to be able to keep growing as a company and growing at the rate, we are like, I need more childcare. And like, I’m just going to have to do that season two, um, to make sure that we’re, we’re, you know, good naturally and hitting those targets and the company keeps growing and she actually really challenged me. And that’s part of, what’s great about coaching, right? It’s like, we think we’re right all the time. And then a coach will take what you say and totally flip it on its head. And she said, at leaves you, and at the time the focus was like a hundred thousand dollars months for the revenue.

Elyse (15:50):

And again, I’m just giving these numbers for context for you. But she said, she’s like, at least you can do that in your sleep. Like, you know how to have a hundred thousand dollar month in your sleep. She said your edge and where you’re actually going to learn and the most and grow the most right now is spending time with your son. And she said, I don’t want you to have more childcare. I don’t want you to hire a nanny for more. I want you to reduce your hours, spend more time with him because that’s where you’re feeling resistance right now. So that’s where you’re going to grow the most and trust and know that you’ve got the processes in place to help grow and scale your business and create the belief system. And this is what really, really helped me create the belief system that you generate the most clients when you’re spending quality time with your family.

Elyse (16:38):

I know like, especially if you’re coming in for the first time to this podcast, welcome, we talk about things that aren’t commonly accepted. That challenge every belief system I had around how making money worked in my life around what was possible in my life. And I remember she told me this and I had to, I said, I had to make her repeat the numbers at the beginning, but she said, I work about 10 hours a week and we have a three and a half million dollar company and we’re growing. And I was, I remember listening to that and thinking there are days, not, not so much since I had my son, but certainly before a days, 10 hour days. And I know if you’re listening, you very likely put in 10 hour days, maybe you’re putting those in right now. But you said my belief system is that I generate by being myself and I generate clients when I’m walking on the beach with my family and I generate clients when I’m spending time with my kids.

Elyse (17:37):

And that was a very powerful reframe for me. So I didn’t, you know, I didn’t instantly launch into like shutting off at noon and time with my son all afternoon, um, and making more money immediately that way. But I did start to, I said, well, if it works for her child, let’s, if it works for me and, um, started to affirm that belief system started to actually track my hours and see how I could reduce the amount of time I was spending. And I started noticing sure enough, there was plenty of things where I just had to up level my viewpoint of myself to say, oh, as you know, as CEO of this business, these like, I really shouldn’t be involved in these emails in the first place that, um, that are sucking away, you know, 30 minutes to an hour of every day and someone who makes the amount of money that I desire to make and also has a life like she wouldn’t be doing this stuff.

Elyse (18:34):

And so I had to really filter through that lens. And as I record this, you know, it’s, it’s, I’m not working 10 hours a week, but I’m probably working closer to maybe 20, 25, um, and spending the rest of time, the rest of the time with family and with, and doing what I love and we’re making more money and we’re bringing on dream clients and we’re, um, you know, the happy when I say we, I mean the team, your family, and myself, and that’s that. So when I talk about this, I want you to notice, like I was not allowing in the possibility of working less, like to me, there was a kind of a limit to how much I felt like I could make based upon the number of hours I was working. And it had to be a reframe of no, the lecture, the less I work, like the less involved I am in the day-to-day, the more we make.

Elyse (19:30):

And, and here’s the thing you ha like you got to show up and do the thing. Okay. So I’m not saying you’re not going to do anything. That’s I want you to be very clear with that. It’s about the quality of what you’re doing during that time. And so are you taking, are you doing high leverage activities? Are you doing low leverage, frantic busy work? And so I’ve had to really focus in on, like, I only do these core types of activities now and everything else gets done through team or through somebody else. Um, but then also creating the belief system for yourself of, you know, you do create more clients when you are spending time with family or when you’re taking the best care of yourself. Right? Like how often I remember working with, you know, another woman several months ago, who was, she was really like running herself into the ground because she had a belief system that she had to work twice as hard as everybody else to achieve the same results.

Elyse (20:27):

And, uh, because of some of her heritage. And I remember we talked about like how that was not serving her. And she was physically starting to have a lot of issues. And, um, she, we, we really did a reframe and like, she actually creates the best results when she is taking the best care of herself and when she’s spending time on self-care. And so this is really, really important. It’s so important often just don’t notice it because we, again, you’re as Bob Proctor talks about your paradigm, it’s that ingrained belief system that runs the show for you, that you don’t even realize is running the show for you, but whatever rules you have around how much money you’re allowing into your life, how much joy you’re allowing it, how much time freedom you’re allowing, and just look at your results and look at how you’re showing up every day and notice.

Elyse (21:18):

And that’s going to tell you the rules that are running the show for you. So the second, so the first step is to notice. And then the second step is you want to create belief systems that actually support you in allowing more into your life and has we’re actually. So I would invite you, we’re doing a training, um, on September 21st on how to rewire your brain for success and for what you want. And so if you, if you want to get in on that training, send me a DM and I’ll send you the link. You can just DME at Elise Archer on Instagram, or you can email, um, assist a S S I S T at [inaudible] dot com. And my assistant will send you the link if you want to register for that. But you’ve got to create belief systems that support you and the noticing of the way systems kind of overlap a little bit.

Elyse (22:06):

Right. But I wanted to break them out into two, um, and the beliefs. So again, register for this training, if you want to like, really do a deep dive in how to rewire your belief systems. But, um, one of my, one of my belief systems from growing up was that people like us didn’t fly first class. So I, uh, I don’t know if you can relate to that, but I always thought, oh, first class is like, it’s such a quote, unquote, waste of money. And so I never did. So I always flew coach flew Southwest, you know, use points and shout out to Southwest, by the way I love Southwest. And we, we still, we fly Southwest sometimes, you know, with, especially with jackets, like it’s easier, but, um, I, I like, I would never have dreamed allowing myself to fly first class. And, but I started working with mentors and high level, you know, high level mentors where they wouldn’t dream of not flying first class.

Elyse (23:01):

And I remember thinking like, what is the difference between them and me? I started looking, oh, they’ve got different money beliefs and different money rules. And one of the, one of the beliefs that I started creating that I would encourage you to create for yourself is that money always, always, always shows up to it to support your expansion and your expression. And part of, part of your expansion is traveling in a way that makes you feel high vibe and makes you feel Luxe. And so I started giving myself permission to fly first class. And I remember the first time this is, it kind of ties in with like where I had a great belief system and I had a not so great belief system going, but one of the first times I flew first class, um, was to Italy for this mastermind. And it was taking place in Venice.

Elyse (23:53):

And I remember, you know, hopping on that international flight and like settling in to my first class ticket, my first class seat and just feeling the different energy in that part of the plane. And it is different if you fly first class, you know, it is different. And I had had to really like anchor in the belief that it was okay to invest. And again, with, with money, use the word, invest, not spend like really help you think about money working for you. Um, but to invest that money in myself and saying, I am worth having this type of inexperience and I’m worth allowing myself to fly first class. I don’t think I told family or friends even didn’t really talk about it much because I knew I would get questions, especially from my family about, well, we know you could have saved that money.

Elyse (24:45):

You could have done this with it. Why are you, why are you doing that? But the up-leveled experience I had in Italy, because I allowed myself to fly first class and showed up refreshed and had had beautiful food on the flight and was able to lean back and relax more and journal. I had so many aha, so many downloads calm, cause it was in that energy that later went on to help me sell more and grow my business more. It was, it was transformational. And I remember on that trip also, you know, lodging and we were, we were doing the, um, we were doing the retreat, the mastermind at this beautiful. It was, I don’t know if it was a palace. I think it actually was. I think it was here’s what’s funny. I think it was a former mental asylum that was converted into a palace.

Elyse (25:33):

So there was definitely some energy going on there, but it was cool. And it was, you know, the rooms were gorgeous, but I remember one night that I was there. Um, cause I had an old story about procrastinating. I’m booking my travel cause I didn’t want to spend the money on it. So I procrastinated on booking travel and the only room that was left for one of the nights I was there was like the, the nicest room at the hotel. And I remember seeing the quote for it and going, oh my gosh, that’s like a mortgage. That’s a, that’s a mortgage payment one night, that’s a month’s mortgage, but it was all that was left. And so I had to really anchor into, I am the type of woman who can fly first class and stay in the nicest suite in this hotel and enjoy it.

Elyse (26:18):

And it was such an up-leveled experience. It was a beautiful suite. I remember there was some mix up too. And there was someone who was having a birthday that, uh, that night, and I guess this guy was supposed to get this beautiful, like cake and candy and champagne and treats. And somehow it ended up in my room when I got back, rubbing this fun night with girlfriends out in Venice and I just showed up and there was this big birthday spread, like with just the most beautiful desserts, most beautiful Italian desserts you can ever imagine. And I called down and I was like, I think there’s a mix. Someone else was supposed to get this. And they said, oh, okay. Like, no problem. Just keep it and enjoy it for yourself. And so that’s what happens that like you get fun surprises like that when you decide you’re worth it.

Elyse (27:06):

And when you decide that there’s no, nothing different in anybody, other than that, nothing different than anyone who has what you want other than they decided they were worth it. And they decided they were willing to allow it into their life. Now the part of my belief system that now I kind of laugh about, but, um, I was unaware of at the time, so I still definitely had a scarcity energy going onto what I was doing. It was like, I was, you know, doing this trip, flying first class, staying in this nice suite, but there was still a like, uh, some guilt around it like, oh my gosh, can I do this? Is this too much? And yada yada. And so I wanted to get photos done at this particular mastermind. And there was a photographer, um, who was brought in and flown in from the states who was like the photographer for this group of women.

Elyse (27:56):

And she does beautiful photos, but her packages I think started at around $3,000 for the package. And I wanted new brand photos and I thought, gosh, wouldn’t Italy be a great place to get them done in. But I had, in my mind, I felt like I had already quote, unquote, spent so much on the, on the flight and on the hotel that I, that I was like, I’d reached my cap in terms of how much expansion I was willing to allow in. And so I was like, oh, well I want photos with this woman, but it’s just too much to do at all. So I’m going to go see if there’s a local photographer who can do my photos. So I find this local guy and he’s like $300 for the day and a book. I was like, oh, awesome. I can’t get photos. And I don’t have to break the bank on this and yada yada.

Elyse (28:44):

And so I booked the photo shoot with him and, and look nice guy like photos or the photos were good. I’ll say that. But they honestly, most of them I couldn’t use, I mean, a girl needs to have a little retouching, a little, you know, a little help with some of them. They were like, there was none of that. The angles were awkward. The lighting wasn’t good on a lot of them. I looked at some of them and thought, oh my gosh, I didn’t know I had that wrinkle. Like, I’m just, again, I’ll keep it real with you here on the podcast. And so there’s probably, you know, got this beautiful trip to Italy, the opportunity for gorgeous photos that we could use again and again for my brand and my girlfriends who went and invested in themselves and allow themselves to have the pro photographer, like the photos are stunning and I’ve got maybe five photos that I could use for this shoot that we’ve used for my brand.

Elyse (29:35):

But, you know, looking back on it it’s, um, it was a great experience in how much I was willing to allow and the money rules that were at play about what is too much. So just, I just want you to know that and again, any part of your life where you’re not receiving at the level that you desire, there’s part of you. It’s like, there’s something you’re not willing to allow in. Okay. And so you want to keep going back to how good am I willing to let life get, how good am I willing to let life get? And then the third step to this. So first just notice second is create the belief systems that support you. And then the third is to relax and focus on feeling good. Okay. Relax and focus on feeling good. And this one was the hardest for me to understand and the hardest for me to come to grips with.

Elyse (30:27):

Okay, because it defies most everything that you’re taught about how you make money, about how you sell, about how you create success in this world. And here’s what I want you to know. Any sort of negative emotion in your body ranging from boredom to overwhelm, to anxiety, to anger, frustration, all the way down to depression. Grief is literally resistance to what you want. It’s it’s friction, it’s resistance. Okay. So when this, it starts to make sense, and we’re not going to do a deep dive into emotions and frequency on this, this particular podcast, but your, your emotions, everything vibrates on this planet, you do the that’s the way you’re able to hear this is that there’s a sound vibration going into your ear. So this particular podcast has a vibration and a frequency. That’s how you’re able to tune into this and then tune into another podcast and then go on to Sirius radio and listen to something else.

Elyse (31:31):

All those vibrations are happening simultaneously, where you are right now, but it’s just whichever one you’re tuned into right now. That’s how you, your best. You’re a match for it. That’s why you’re able to listen to it. And so your emotions are your body’s conscious way of telling you what you’re a vibrational match for. And so everything that you desire, everything you want also has a frequency to it and the things that you want. So let’s say you you’re, you’re making a hundred thousand dollars a year, but you want to make a million dollars a year. Well, that million dollars a year has a higher frequency than that. A hundred thousand dollars a year. Okay. And so that you want to tap in and think about what does that million dollars a year feel like? Cause the only reason you want it, the only reason you want anything is because of how you think it’s going to make you feel when you have it.

Elyse (32:23):

So what does it feel like? And you just really think about this. It’s actually quite true. You want the car cause you think it’s going to make you feel excited. Up-leveled expansive. Like you’re, you’re going to have that experience, uh, that higher level experience of yourself. Do you want the money? Because you think it’s going to feel like freedom, opportunity, ease. I can breathe joy again, expansiveness. So you want to tune into what is the feeling state of that thing that you want of that thing you desire and learn that you can live it now. So you want to learn to look outside less and look inside more and practice that feeling now and focus on feeling good. Now. So there’s the book by Neville Goddard. We actually did it as part of our morning sales supercharge series on feeling is the secret. And it’s so, so, so true feeling good is the secret to everything you want in your life.

Elyse (33:19):

And you feel bad when you’re thinking that there’s something you want, but you can’t have it. Or you’re not worthy of something in your body, feeling bad in that negative emotion. It’s your body’s way of telling you. But you’re actually thinking something that contradicts who you are. Okay. Now I’m not saying go out and buy everything you’ve ever wanted right now, if that’s going to go like max out your credit cards and put you in a negative place emotionally. Okay? So that’s not what I’m saying, but what I’m saying is I want you to focus on feeling good. Now, relaxing, noticing when you’re in a negative emotional state, no judgment on it again, but notice that as resistance, you’re actually creating friction and resistance. It’s kind of like if you thought about your emotions, as you know, appreciation, love joy is at the very top of the scale.

Elyse (34:06):

And then grief. Depression is at the bottom grief. Depression. Shame is at the bottom. There’s when, when we’re in those lower level emotions, it’s like, we’re literally pushing ourselves down. We’re creating friction and resistance from what we want. And so when we learn to focus on feeling good, despite what’s happening outside of us, but when you focus on feeling good, it’s like, you almost, it’s like a, you’re a cork. It’s bobbing back up to the surface. And now you’re back. Your natural state is feeling good. Your natural state as well being your natural state is appreciation and joy and happiness. And when you focus on those things, you, you can only bring into your life what you’re a match for. And you know what you’re a match for by how you’re feeling. So if you want the million dollars. So if you’re sitting here and you’re, you’re earning a hundred thousand dollars a year, but you want the million dollars a year because you think it’s going to make you feel expansive, excited, abundant, prosperous, but then you stay in an emotion of not enough, not enough anxiety overwhelmed.

Elyse (35:06):

You’re not a match for it. So it can’t come to you or you’ll get it by you like win the lottery and then lose it all afterwards. Cause you who you are being is not a match for it. Okay? So you can, the beautiful part about this. Cause it’s very empowering is you can match it now and when you’re that match for it. But you have to focus on how you’re feeling first and stop waiting for something to shift in your outer conditions to decide that you’re going to feel good. But when you realize that when you feel good, then you’re a match for what you want. The way that it works is now you’re a vibrational match for it. So if you focused, what if you just focused today this week, this month, the rest of your life. And it won’t take that long cause you’ll bring it in way faster and then you’ll decide you’re ready for more.

Elyse (35:50):

But what if you focused for now on being a vibrational match for the thing that you desire, feeling, the feelings that you’re going to feel when it comes in, what happens is now you’re a match for it. So now this is when you start to receive ideas, inspiration, downloads, nudges used to talk to this person. You should launch this program. You should hire this coach. You should do that. You should go there because those are the actions that you’re going to take that are going to help you receive that thing that you want, which is increasing how much you’re willing to allow in. So, but, but we’ve got to get ourselves there first. You’re never going to be given the answers for how to get where you want to go to from where you are now, to where you want to be by staying in an emotional state of suffering, lack, anxiety, overwhelm, et cetera.

Elyse (36:40):

So choose to match the emotions of it. Now, focus on feeling good. And I remember when I first heard that one, it felt so foreign, but when I, when I started to listening to it and thinking about it and realized I’m like, yeah, it actually kind of does make sense. And I started focusing on my, my go-to emotional pattern was anxiety and not enoughness. So when I started focusing on peace, calm, worthiness, allowing the emotional part shifted first. So I started to feel better first, but then very quickly thereafter, huge financial uplevels huge life up levels because I become a match for what I wanted. And there’s story. After story, after story, after story of women who were in the, she sells community and men, um, who are having those experiences because they’ve learned to create in a more powerful way. And they’ve learned to call in what they want and allow in more for themselves now, not tomorrow, not next week, but now.

Elyse (37:44):

So I just want to recap for you how to allow in more of what you want, how to increase your ability to receive the good and the abundance that you desire. Notice, just notice how, like what your rules are right now, how much you’re willing to allow in, um, to create the belief systems that support you. And again, send me a DM, if you want to get in on that training. It’s September 21st, um, we’ll send you the link to get registered and then number three, relax and focus on feeling good because when you do that, you release the resistance to what you want from coming in and, um, and then it, it can all come in and it comes in fast because it’s been there, like queued up for you all along. You just had some resistance around allowing it in. Okay. So I hope this serves you.

Elyse (38:32):

Um, this is, you know, from my heart to yours and, um, I would love, I would be so honored if this speaks to you, if you would rate and review the podcast. And, um, if you would share this with someone who you think could benefit from it, who you know is ready for more in, uh, in her life or his life as well. So, all right, my friend, I love you. I’m grateful for you. Thank you so much for tuning in and I will see you on next week’s episode of she sells radio bye for now.

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